Help with shaving DH
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Comments
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I use an electric shaver daily on DH and, no, it does not provide the clean, close shave that he and I are accustomed to. (Although at this point, he is oblivious.). I tried shaving him with a blade razor, but left a few nicks, scrapes and cuts. When I want to “clean him up” well, every other week or so, I use Treo disposable razors by Gillette (they are designed for one person to safely shave another.). Unfortunately, they seem hard to find and the prices vary widely. I shop around on Amazon for boxes of 28 at the best price.0
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I have the Wahl electric shaver that BeachFan recommendsed Works great--except when I've waiting too long in-between shaves. I bought a trimmer for the neck and under the chin and use it when he starts to look like Susquash. After using the trimmer, I then can use the Wahl shaver.0
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I have abandoned shaving my DH. He currently sports a jihadist-style beard. Should we need to attend an event, I take him to a barber for a proper trim.
If he showers twice a month I am happy. I have adjusted expectations (and sometimes physical distance).
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Instead of trying to get a close shave or just letting the beard grow I have an alternate suggestion. Try using a clipper to just keep it close.
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My goodness, you could have described my exact experience with my husband. He uses the electric shaver when I nag him into it a couple of times a week but he just can’t get under his chin. By the time I force him into letting me shave him with a conventional razor, the beard is about an inch long and very hard to shave underneath his chin. My latest attempt involves taking a close-up photo of his unshaven face, and his Santa Claus beard, with my iPad to show him that despite his denials, he really needs a shave.0
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I shave my husband every day using the Wahl wet/dry shaver. I've had this shaver for over a year and never had any problems. Holds a charge for a long time.0
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Somewhat related is grooming my DW. I use scissors, thinning shears and sometimes electric clippers. In her previous life she'd have a fit but now she's just fine as long as I tell her it looks good. Giving myself a haircut using a mirror and electric clippers is a real challenge. I get some bald spots sometimes when I get too close! Rick0
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Finally a post I can add my positive experience to!
I helped DH shave with his razor for a while, but then I was too scared to continue. I bought an electric one. DH wasn't a fan, but we kept at it.
We've now come to a pretty good routine. DH showers every other day. After his shower I use the electric razor on him. I don't worry about getting it done perfectly. The fine hairs under his chin/ on his neck get a bit longer. About once a week I use clippers to catch those hairs and make them shorter, and trim up his moustache. I keep his moustache pretty short. If I don't shave him for more than 3 days, I end up using the clippers in lots of areas because the hairs are just too long for the electric shaver to do a good job.
But basically, I just came to the realization that a close shave ain't gonna happen. He looks pretty decent with the electric shaver.
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I want to say thank you for each and every one for all the wonderful help! I do have the Wahl shaver and I have Norelco clippers. DH has always used the double edge razor blade, I just can’t use it without nick’s. I did get disposable razors for him to use , he doesn’t like to but I told him that’s all they make now. He has very thick hair everywhere, but on his head now. I love your reply of no more close shaves! I don’t feel so guilty now! I have a lot of trouble with feeling like I should be better at all of this! You have no idea how much you all have helped me! Thank you !0
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Very important to use pre shave lotion for electric shavers before shaving. After using the electric shaver also use a post shave balm in case of any irritation. If I don't see that DH uses the shaver every day his beard gets too long but it is a struggle to see that he shaves every day. I am in awe of the poster who said her DH showers every other day! I am lucky to get mine to shower 1x a week and I help him. In between times I have him use the soap foam that you can use which does not require water. I trim his eyebrows and his nails and take him to a place nearby to get his hair cut every couple of months. He does not have alot of hair on his head but it sure grows in his nose and ears.0
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We tried the electric shaver, but he was forgetting to shave under his chin and after several days it was too hard to do with the electric shaver.
Now the caregivers do it manualy twice a week and it is enough. I am not patient enough. In Tunisia the were doing it every day and they even shave his underarms. I imagine now he has urchins under the arms Hopfully he never complains.
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Thanks for all your comments. It's been driving me crazy that my DH shaves his face but always misses a spot under his jaw, and now he doesn't get to his throat. I tried watching him and helpfully pointing out the missed spots... so that was ONE day.
He bought some electric razors. I'll check out the Wahl. I suggested maybe it's time to go back to having a beard, then all he has to do is shave his throat.
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Good to see this old thread revived. At the beginning of Covid I began cutting my husband’s and sister’s hair and she cut mine. It turned out to be not that difficult and so we just continued. My husband was had MCI and did his own short beard and mustache until August of 2021 when I took over his beard, mustache and neck. I use a Gillette trimmer, small scissors and razor on his neck. That is by far the most challenging. I trim it every 2 or 3 days before we get in the shower, using the trimmer first and then the razor. It’s by no means perfect, but if I do it at least twice a week it doesn’t look too bad. He was always so meticulous about his beard and mustache before the dementia that I just feel bad if he starts to look scruffy, even though he doesn’t notice. I also trim his eyebrows with a small scissors when needed, and his fingernails and toenails.
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A number of the moms in the adults with special needs group use this razor for their sons.
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Commonly Used Abbreviations
DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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