Week-end to my parents with poop accident

French

As my brother came back from New York with his wife and son, my sisters and me gathered to my parents last weekend. They saw my partner last time in June. So only 4 months bu were shocked bout the changes.

Last time as in the morning I was running early  in the forest, my partner arrived for the breakfast with his short on his pyjama. My brother helped him to put his clothes on and was very surprised how complicated it was. It is easier with his son, who is 3.

This time, he had to help me to manage a bowel problem. I should have anticipated. My partner ate very few at lunch and I know that it is a sign. The problem is that the toilets are so small and the door in opening in, not out, so that I can’t accompany him. And when is in the toilet, there isn’t enough place to open the door, so I can’t see what’s happening. But the initial problem is that he went too late or tried to poop still standing, i will never know. So, he was in the toilets with poop in his underwear, on his hands… but I couldn’t enter and help. The result is that at the end there was poop everywhere on the toilets tiles, door…

Hopefully while I was managing the shower and clothes cleaning, my young bother managed the toilets cleaning.

The others where waiting to enroll my partner in an activity so that he will forget that there has been an issue (he is very ashamed).

When everything was cleaned, everything was forgotten.

When I told to my brother it wasn’t so difficult because it happens only about once a week, he was shocked. For him, it is already a lot. But for me, compared with what I read here, it is nothing… I imagine you understand.

The good news is that he repeatedly said he wants to go back in Tunisia. When my sister asked how long he wants to go there he answered 1 or 2 years.

Buggsroo

Hi French,

I am really glad your husband likes Tunisia. This will make it easier for you when you have to decide where would be best for him. As for the poo incident, people really do not understand how quickly dementia patients deteriorate.

Joe C.

French, As difficult as it is to have accidents/incidents when we are around other family members, I also believe it is good for them to see what challenges we face on a daily basis.

Ed1937

French, I am sorry you had to deal with that. But if there's an upside to it, you will probably get a lot more understanding from family members now. It's amazing how much they can learn in just a few moments when the time is right.

JoseyWales

Wow. What a time.

It's amazing how we can see the patterns after the fact. DH hasn't had poo issues YET, but he deals more with constipation right now. And that's a problem itself. 

It says so much about your family that they were willing to help out and not make your partner feel bad. 

I'm glad he liked Tunisia. That means you have a good option!

Joydean

French, you are so blessed to have a understanding and caring family. They truly saw how hard this is for you and your partner. God bless you and your family!