after the trust is done

Mikela

So we have a "settlement" in place that was read into the court record and agreed upon by all parties.  My attorney has been putting together trust and will documents as agreed.  In the meantime, I was told to provide any of my father's bills that I had been paying to my attorney who in turn gave them to the court appointed ad litem who turned and dropped them off at my father's house.  Stepmother is acting like no agreement was reached and sent me a nasty email that she wouldn't pay the landline phone bill I provided and they are now getting collection calls.  It was due on the 15th.  She keeps accusing me of stuff that isn't true and has been stuck in victim mode for about a year.  Is there anyway I can deal with her civilly in person, once this trustee stuff is settled?  I'd like to speak to and see my Dad again.  She has blocked cell phones and has refused to answer the door, even for her own attorney and even the ad litem.  I've half decided that when I have the opportunity to see my Dad again regularly to start quoting bible verses or singing to myself.  I am just sick of the pettiness and of stepmother's down-the-rabbit hole rants.  She takes no responsibility for her actions/inactions which is why we ended up in court.   Dad's safety and security is priority number one.  Is there a better, more civil way to approach such an outright hostile person?  Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.  I just need a good way to defuse the hostility.  

Mikela

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dayn2nite2

I also don't understand this trust.  All bills should go to trustee for payment and you shouldn't be communicating with her at all about them, nor does she have to pay bills, the trustee does that.

Unfortunately, unless you can also arrange for a supervised visitation with guidelines, you may not be able to see him again.  I think the relationship is permanently broken between you and her, and she's the gateway to him.

I may have missed something here - I thought you were going to obtain guardianship of him and get him placed.  Under those circumstances, you wouldn't have to deal with her but as long as she lives with him she will block you from seeing him.  In a facility, he has the right to receive any visitors he wants and she can't block you.

Mikela

We have agreed on a trustee and also a care managing company, but the official documents haven't been signed yet.  The basic terms of the agreement was read into the court record at the emergency guardianship hearing.  So we are in limbo until the trust, will, and other documents are in place.  In the meantime, the bills still need to be paid.  I thought the ad litem appointed to dad by the court would be competent, but he turned out to be bias, unprofessional and not exactly diligent.  He refused to even speak to us, based on my stepmother's wild rants.  We have a couple legitimate complaints to report him to the state bar if it becomes necessary.  He is pretty leery of us now.  Stepmother's attorney is in the same boat.   He transferred dad's house into Stepmother's name after the guardianship paperwork was filed with the courts.   It doubled the property taxes owed yearly on the house because of a homestead exemption.  It also did not go unnoticed by the judge at the emergency hearing.  My attorney is supposed to have a working version of the trust and will documents and is meeting with ad litem and attorney for stepmother next week.    The holidays have just slowed the process down.

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