What was I thinking? He's back in dreamland - I'm wide awake.

ButterflyWings

The irony. I am not the one with the bladder issues but here I sit, unable to sleep while my LO snores peacefully, dreaming of who knows what. A short while ago I was awakened from a sound sleep, as always... although we got 4 hours in this time before DH started his nighttime bathroom excursions. That's great! Win #1.

During the last UTI it was hourly toilet trips -- often resulting in water, water everywhere (floor, toilet seat, shower curtain). Of course it was pee, not water, and I was really getting sleep deprived recently. 

So this time DH used the toilet ok-ish, choosing to stand which means sprinkling all over the place especially since he is only half awake -- but at least that avoids the 30-60 minute sit-down version in the middle of the night with me trying to convince him he's done. And him refusing to budge from the throne. Its midnight. That clash of wills in our small bathroom at all hours of the night is no fun, so wiping or mopping up a little pee (or a lot)...its ok, I'll take it. Win #2.

Got the bathroom wiped up quickly without his stepping in it -- our hands washed etc. Back to bed and all tucked in, inside of 5 minutes. Win #3. 

I'm feeling so good about how this is going, I decided to grab us a thirst quencher since the heat is cranked up high (it is cold outside). What was I thinking? Sometimes it works fine. Tonight it did not. I hand DH a half full glass of juice and tell him what it is. He takes it, looks inside, then leans away from me and starts tilting the cup sideways to examine it more closely while I channel Gene Wilder in the original Willy Wonka's Charlie & the Chocolate Factory unsuccessfully admonishing one of the unruly children with calm-ish "Don't, Stop" instructions that they completely ignore. 

Yes like a slow motion disaster scene, DH leans further away, places his elbow on my side of the bed, tilts the cup and his head far to the side, peers harder (in the dark) at the liquid I'm now begging him to just drink, and he drops the whole darn thing, pouring cold cranberry juice on the bed - (my side, the one with no pads and layers...i.e. the unprotected mattress side). Great. 

So, 30+ minutes later. I have now changed the multiple bedding layers, tried to wipe and blot the damp part of the mattress as best as possible. Hoping it is ok.  I don't feel like doing laundry right now. At least it's not pee. Partial win I guess. (?) His dementia and my caregiver delirium have warped my senses, truly. 

He's back in dreamland. I'm wide awake. Thanks for listening.

M1

Oh BW.......breaks my heart for you. So difficult and exhausting....

mommyandme (m&m)

OMGOSH! 

That’s so hard… your story reads as if you can somehow keep it light as to not break you.  I also imagine you’re broken too.  

I’m so sorry for these trials and hope you can get some rest and peace soon.  

He’s so blessed to have you in his corner.  

Tfreedz

Butterfly, you put my issues in perspective, so thanks for that. I always think, “it could be worse” sounds like you got worse at the end of the night! By the way, you are a really good writer, I felt like I was right there. I hope you are journaling your experience you could make a book out of it!

GenePT

Oh BW, so challenging, so frustrating…so much work. Sleep deprivation, interrupted sleep. And you get the wet spot to sleep on. Your LO is truly blessed to have YOU. 

I agree, you are a wonderful writer.