Update on Mom(12)

abc123 · February 2022

She’s doing well. Really well at my house. With the help of a great hospice team and a private CNA , her meds are under control. Her BM’s are once or twice a day as opposed to 3 to 4 times a day. She is happy and comfortable. She hasn’t once asked about where she is, her house back in Texas or Dad. But when Dad calls, I put him on speaker and she responds to him as best she can. Some days it’s hard for her to get the words out. And her voice is very soft now.

Last night she had visitor’s! Her two grandsons, her 4 month old great granddaughter and her son ( my brother)! I knew the boys were coming with their wife’s and the baby. I had no clue my brother was coming. I was in moms room with the grandsons - she knew who they were. We put the baby next to her and she was amazed. It was a beautiful moment. I went into the kitchen to get something for momma and my brother was just standing there in the kitchen. I lost it! I was so happy he was here. I couldn’t stop hugging him. He’s my 6’4” baby brother and I love him to the moon and back and all the stars in between! It was the first time any of them had seen mom, last time they saw her she could still walk. Now she’s confined to bed and she’s weak and quiet. It was very hard for them to see her like this. They didn’t know how to communicate with her and they were uncomfortable. They would come and go back and forth from her bedside to the kitchen. I explained to them that she’s still there, talk clearly to her and give her time to reply. It takes time for her to process our comments and to find her words. As time passed they were more at ease. It was a beautiful visit and it proved to me that I’ve done the right thing for her!

Dad is still in Texas dealing with selling the house. He calls for my input. All contracts from the realtor, the moving and packing company are emailed to me for review. Dad is doing a good job but he’s alone in the house and I worry about him. I think I’ll probably fly there for 2 or 3 days to help with the art collections. So far, so good. I’m a freaked out mess right now because of the nighttime sitter. She’s got to go. Very high strung, never stops talking. OMG. She’s a good CNA but her personality is too much for me to deal with.

Y’all are always in my prayers and in my heart and thoughts! Everyday! Hang in there! We can do this!

toolbeltexpert · February 2022

So glad for your great visit. Prayers for you as well.

Tfreedz · February 2022

Aww, ABC your post brought tears to my eyes, happy tears!!! I’m so happy that your mom is with you now and the family was all able to spend time, I’m sure you took lots of photos. I’m also glad it’s going well for now and you are getting a good routine.

Sorry about your night sitter, you and mom need a calming presence, not the opposite, lol. So much on your Dad’s shoulders right now, I’m sure that’s hard. You are doing so much to help...I’m sending you a pat on the back and huge hug!!

Keep posting updates, it’s great to hear from you. I’m excited to hear about when your Dad finally is in town, he must be so relieved to know you are taking such great care of his DW so he can wrap things up where he is.

M1 · February 2022

Great news abc...and what a nice surprise to see your brother. I know you must be breathing sighs of relief.

SusanB-dil · February 2022

Yay! It is always great to see good-news here... and a surprise visit from brother. Nice!

Quilting brings calm · February 2022

I’m so glad it’s going well - except for that nighttime person. A night time person should be a quiet person since their role is to help when everyone else in the house is asleep- or winding down for the day. You may have to remove yourself to a different section of your home while she is there… or if early enough evening, run an errand.

I’m glad that you have your mom where it’s easier for you to deal with. Hopefully your visits to your parent’s home will end soon. Soon is a relative term, I know.

I hope your visitors are near enough to make it a regular thing and allow you a break.