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Hallucinations/Delusions

I have been reading posts a lot in the past year or so, but haven't posted much.  I'm afraid I am going to be posting questions more often.   My DH was diagnosed with MCI in 2014, then unspecified dementia in 2018, and Alz in April of 2021,  he turned 66 in December.  He seems to be declining quickly.  Two days ago he called me at work to tell me that we "had trespassers" in our backyard and that he went out there but they wouldn't talk to him and that they followed him.  We live in the country in northern Michigan.  We have no close neighbors, and I believe he was referring to our fire pit and the log pile near it.  He called me several times and I told him I'd be home soon.  When I got home, I reassured him there was nothing to fear.  He told me I was wrong and how could I be so stupid?  I distracted him with some movies on TV.  The next day I waited at work for a call, hoping it didn't happen again.  It did, and this time he told me that they were building a fort and that they had logs with rounded ends.  I called his doc and he said to give him a seroquel when the delusions start.  He has had night hallucinations but when he turned on the light and saw there was no one there, he was better.  With this, it is lasting for hours at a time, and no one can convince him otherwise.  Today, he called me 5 times by 10:00 a.m.  He said he was going to "call the cops on those bastards".  I had my mom go to our house, she lives 100 ft from us, and she gave him another Seroquel.  When I got home he was sleeping, but still insistent that they were there, and was angry that I wouldn't admit they were there.  I don't want to give him drugs all of the time, but I also don't want him to be scared.  I know some will tell me to retire and be home, but I am only 58 and I still enjoy my job and need time away from him too.  I also anticipate needing to pay for some home health or I may need to place him at some point, I will need my income to help pay for those probable expenses.  I hate that there is no way to plan for this disease!  Does anyone else have insight into how long and how bad this stage might be?

Comments

  • Ed1937
    Ed1937 Member Posts: 5,084
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    Sorry you are going through this, but I can't answer your question. Maybe you could try telling him that the sheriff's department was there, and said they would not return because they were talked to, and they would go to jail if they did. When someone has hallucinations, you will have your hands full if you try to tell them they're wrong. Find another way around the problem.

    An adjustment in medications might be in order. Talk to his doctor.

  • sandwichone123
    sandwichone123 Member Posts: 743
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    I agree with you about continuing to work. I'm still in my 50's and working is my one constant. I've been working since I was nine and it keeps me grounded.

    Remember that whatever response you have will need to be planted in the truth of his delusion. So you could follow Ed's advice that the sheriff's department took care of them, or you could move the logs and fire pit and let them know they're gone, but it just doesn't work to say they were never there. In your DH's mind, that just makes you unreliable, perhaps lying, perhaps having some nefarious purpose with those guys.

    I've read that improv acting is the way to go--starting with "yes and" to our loved ones' statements and improvising with what we would do or say if that really were the case: "Guys out there!!!! Where's my broom? I'll show them what yard to hang out in!!" And then noisily go clear those guys out from the yard (and perhaps move the offending items out of sight).

  • JulieB46
    JulieB46 Member Posts: 50
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    Thanks for the suggestions.  I will try to help him deal with this.

  • JoseyWales
    JoseyWales Member Posts: 602
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    We went through that stage, too. I'm going to say it lasted about a year. For DH, he was convinced that there were people racing too fast past our house, and that they were going to kill someone. Of course this was made worse here because cars DO speed by our house. The speed limit on our back road is 55.

    I wrote emails and letters to the police. That were never actually sent. (OK, I did send one, because there WAS this one car that really was going too fast.) I also made phone calls and DH listened to my side of the conversation. Again, I never really made that phone call. But it helped DH think that I was doing something. And then I faked stories about how I saw police with a car stopped up the road, and I'd often say things like, "Look, no one is going fast today, the police must have stopped it."

  • Cynbar
    Cynbar Member Posts: 539
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    My DH also went through this stage. Sometimes the delusions were upsetting, like people in the back yard. But sometimes they weren't (other than to me) ----he often thought there were 10 or so people in the house for a club meeting, and why was I serving dinner to just the two of us? I agree 100% with the other posters, you can't try to reason him out of it, you have to jump into his reality and pretend to deal with it. I had a couple of people whom I knew I could always use for "pretend" phone calls, looking like I was calling the police or a neighbor or whatever would work in the moment. One recurring delusion was that someone had dropped off a baby and now it was missing ---- I called his sister and she told him she had picked up the baby. The right medication and dosage worked well for us also, DH did well on scheduled Zyprexa, but there are several choices. Talk to his doctor and see if he can come up with something that will help. FWIW, this stage did thankfully pass.
  • Crushed
    Crushed Member Posts: 1,442
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    You will hate to hear this but that is a very long time after diagnosis to be leaving a demented person alone PLEASE tell us there are no guns anywhere on the property.  That is the terrifying prospect

  • Doityourselfer
    Doityourselfer Member Posts: 224
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    JulieB46,  

    My late husband experienced seeing people in our yard and in neighbors' yards early in his AD (2016).  He was 57 at that time.  I retired in 2015 from a state government job before any of his symptoms started showing so I was fortunate to be his caregiver until he passed in December 2021.  

    He'd then see these people in our car, in the shopping mall, in restaurants, etc.  He became highly agitated when he saw these people which I didn't see.  He wanted to call the police to get them out.  It was a nightmare because whatever he saw was real to him and I couldn't convince him otherwise.  He was prescribed low doses of Seroquel in the beginning and the dosage increased as time went on.  I didn't like to call them hallucinations because I didn't know what he was actually seeing.  

    As time went on, he saw these "people" less and less as he progressed into his horrid, life robbing disease.  He was diagnosed with Alzheimer's via a PET scan in late 2017.  In my experience earlier in the disease was the worst to deal with due to his agitation.  Each person is different and there's no way to tell what is going to happen.  I can only suggest that your husband is going to need to have someone stay with him while you're at work.  I know it's an extremely difficult situation for both you and your husband. 

  • extex
    extex Member Posts: 62
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    I agree with the above comment. Seven years on the dementia road is a long time .  Your LO has probably reached the point that he needs supervision when you are away for long periods of time.  The delusions are evidence that he is reaching the more advanced stages of the disease.  He will likely be fixated on/around the fire pit and logs forever.  This could be expanded to other things also since the delusions will likely increase.  He will need several increases in seroquel dosage to control these. This also needs to be closely monitored due to possible dizziness and falling.  In my wife’s case, her delusions and illusions always occurred in a bathroom.  We have three bathrooms and she has experienced episodes in each one.  One, the master bath with adjacent walk in closets, a dressing area and separate shower/bath area, was her favorite place in the house before dementia.  Now, due to some really bad delusional experiences occurring there, it is impossible to get her to enter that room.  She also wants someone to accompany her to any other bathroom.  There are lots of things around a house that he can injure himself badly with.  Since you are still working adult daycare may be a good option for him if one is available in your area.  Otherwise, I would try to hire a sitter or at least someone to look in on him periodically while you are away. Hope my experiences and suggestions help you decide how to handle the problem.
  • Ed1937
    Ed1937 Member Posts: 5,084
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    Extex, is it possible that the mirror(s) might be causing the delusions with other people being in the house? If so, you could cover them with a film or something else so she couldn't see her own reflection.
  • extex
    extex Member Posts: 62
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    Thanks Ed, I tried that in the master bath and it did not help.  The mirrors are still covered and she will still not enter the room.  She talks to her friends in the mirrors in the other bathrooms.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more