My Dad Passed Away This Morning

LongBee2021

While I was as prepared as I could be, I am heartbroken. At the same time, I am so happy he passed peacefully in his sleep. The past 3 weeks have been especially difficult for him.. I'm so glad he's not suffering anymore. I am so happy I got the opportunity to take care of him. I am so happy he didn't die alone. I slept on the floor in his room when he went comatose. 

I've never been without him. It was so hard to let the funeral home take him away. I am now wondering how I am going to sleep tonight and what I am going to do with myself tomorrow and the rest of the week. Day by day I guess. 

I've been his caregiver so long I feel like I don't know what life on the outside is. I will be running some much needed errands tomorrow and starting to plan his funeral. I have no idea how I am going to get back to normal. It seems impossible. My house feels empty. I keep walking by his bedroom and expecting to see him sleeping peacefully. 

There are some rough days ahead. 

M1

I'm sorry for your loss LongBee.

my3sons2.0

I know exactly how you feel. I lost my mom in September and I still miss her every day. I was with her when she passed and spent the entire summer by her bedside. I've been her caregiver for years and moved in with my parents two years ago.  Altho the last weeks were brutal I wouldn't change a thing. I was blessed to be by my mom's side, caring for her, and I wasn't ready to let go. I cherish the memories but admit to feeling lost without her. You have my deepest sympathy.

Mint

I’m so very sorry for the loss of your dad Longbee.

SusanB-dil

So sorry for your loss.  I know it will be quite an adjustment.

harshedbuzz

Longbee-

I am sorry for your loss. Be gentle with yourself as you take steps into the next phase of your life.

HB 

DrinaJGB

So sorry for your loss. When I lost my father a few years ago I had been his caregiver as well as caregiver to my DH. It was so hard to lose my dad. I slept in one of his shirts for a year. I still have it and wear it sometimes. Grieve in your own way. Everything is acceptable.

toolbeltexpert

Sorry for your loss Longbee I will keep you in my prayer for the days ahead.

​fesk

I am very sorry for your loss.

MLS2021

So sorry for your loss.

jfkoc

It is hard. We lose someone who was an integral part of our lives. At the same time we lose our job. I remember feeling rather stranded with my emotions which were all over the place.

Getting back to normal? I don't think we ever do because our lives have been forever changed. However, you will endure grief and it has a life of it's own. In time it will lessen its' grip and walk by your side instead of all over you.

I too send my condolences and hope that  you will continue to use the friends you have made here for support.

HeyDforDaughter

You have my deepest condolences as well Longbee. I pray for strength to carry you through these next couple of days and beyond. Your grief is your own. Continue to reach out on your bad days and your good. It may be cliche but we are here for you. And in a way, you're here for those of us who haven't experienced such loss. In my case, my grief came in spurts. The morning after my Dad died I caught myself getting out of bed ready to change and go to the hospice facility where he had been staying. It was so routine, "get up, go see Daddy" as I had been every day for the two (2) weeks that he had been there. Then the reality hit, he wasn't there to see. He wasn't there for me to take care of. The other spurt was seeing his obituary in the paper. It was still shocking to see and absorb. Heck, I even wrote it for the funeral home.  But I guess my other senses hadn't processed it yet or caught up to my emotions.  And finally, the last big spurt was months later when I heard a joke that had the same kind of dry sense of humor my Dad and I shared and I thought to myself for a split second, "I have to tell Daddy this joke, he'd get a kick out of it." Longbee  you were blessed with such a great relationship with your Dad and had the honor of doing God's work to take care of him. Lean on your memories of him and the strength of our prayers to get you through. You will get through. Hugs.

LicketyGlitz

Oh, Longbee, sending you peace as you navigate this next phase of grief, bewilderment, new challenges, joy for your father's freedom, and hopefully some blossoming excitement for what's yet to come for you. I felt much the same way when my mom died - happy for her, at a loss for myself in many respects (I'm not entirely though it). I hope the journey to your new self brings the satisfaction of a job well done for your dad, and inspiration for your future, you know... eventually.

LizG55

Longbee, I'm so sorry for the loss of your dad, but at least he went peacefully and that's something that you can hold onto.  I still miss my dad who died from AD.

 Life will slowing move forward but it does take time. Just be patient and loving with yourself.... Hugs  

Domestic Diva

LongBee,

I'm so sorry for your loss.  I just joined here and was fondly reading your posts as my LO is following the same path as yours.  Sleeping 20 hours per day if I allow.  Take care of yourself and maybe you could pop back on here to help others with their struggles.  

[email protected]

I am new to this forum and so sorry to hear about your loss. Peace be with you.

numb

My heartfelt condolences on the passing of your dear father.

GothicGremlin

I'm so sorry LongBee. It will be an adjustment.

As I write this, I'm realizing that it's been seven years almost to the day since my dad passed away. I still miss him. The pain of his loss isn't anywhere near as bad as it was seven years ago, but periodically, and it weird ways, the loss of him crops up.  Like - a couple of months ago when I went to the pharmacy to get my booster shot, this older guy in front of me who was on his way out said to the medical assistant, "don't forget - hurry every chance you get".  My dad always said that as a teasing parting shot.  There was a definitely prick of pain when I heard that guy at the pharmacy say that, but then I smiled because I was reminded of my dad.

wyoming daughter

Im so sorry for your loss.  Take some much needed care of yourself.

Joydean

Longbee, I’m sorry for your loss but so glad your dad is no longer in the claws of this horrible disease. He is held gently and loving in the arms of our Heavenly Father.  Take time for yourself and rest.