Update on moving momma

abc123

It's been 23 days since we moved momma from the house in Texas to my house in Louisiana.

Each day is a learning experience. I have found a great lady for the night shift. She works from 8pm until 8am. She is very good and kind. She started caregiving when her parents became ill. Her dad is still alive and has dementia. He is in a good facility that he chose in the early days after his wife died. She wants to bring him home to care for him BUT he won't hear of it. He believes his wife is with him where he is and won't leave his wife. 

Finding one good sitter for the day shift, 8am to 4pm has been a nightmare. I thought I had found the right lady but after slowing down and really paying attention to what she was doing and not doing, I had to let her go. Another new sitter started on Friday. She got into caregiving when her grandparents had dementia. When they both passed away, she continued in caregiving. I hope and pray she works out! I think she's the 5th or 6th one. 

The 4 hours in between sitters, dad and I spend time with momma. It's hard having people in and out of the house constantly. Hospice comes Monday thru Friday to bathe her. The nurse comes at least once a week, twice if I feel like somethings wrong. I don't know how you all do this, with or without help! You are all truly my hero's! I have my days and nights mixed up. Running on very little sleep. BUT yesterday I slept from 3am to 6pm last night. I could actually lay on the floor and go back to sleep! Dad has been here since Saturday. He is a lot of extra work. He made an offer on a house, we will know tomorrow if it will be accepted. The market here is crazy. Houses are selling in a day. The house he put an offer on went on the market Friday morning, we looked at it at noon and put in our offer immediately.

Momma, Dad and I are still alive. It will be a miracle if I survive this emotionally. Hang in there everyone! Sending you peace and good wishes.

ButterflyWings

Hang in there abc123 - you can do it!

Definitely see if hospice has recommendations and help for your own respite, or massage, or whatever they can suggest and offer. I know what you mean about it being extra work with the revolving door of helpers, as much as that is needed and appreciated. It feels like Grand Central Station sometimes with just 2 visitors during a day -- which definitely has my days and nights mixed up as you say.

Just really, really be as gentle and attentive to your own quiet time and physical + emotional self-care as you can. Preaching to the choir I know-- it seems like the last thing on the list and virtually impossible when you are dog-tired and also trying to help support both your LOs as you are. Hopefully some friends, family, or social workers can identify some things to support dad so you don't have to be the only source for EVERYone and everything.

You are a great daughter. And also a very special person beyond that role. We have to get through this with enough left to not only survive, but to thrive. That's the goal. We can do it.

M1

glad to have the update abc, I've been wondering how it was going. Hang in there....

Joydean

ABC thank you for updating us. I too have been wondering how things were going with your family. Sure hope everything goes well on the house. I know what you mean about housing right now! It seems the houses sell as soon as the sign goes up, sometimes before! We had a friend that had decided to sell their home, had talked to a agent, then changed their mind, but the agent had already gotten a offer from a couple from California offering 50% more than they were even asking! It’s crazy! 

Take care of yourself! 

abc123

Thank you, all three of you for your response and support! Absolutely invaluable!

mommyandme (m&m)

So glad to hear “the machine” is running well enough for now. Thanks for the update.