New noises, outside care, and wow

Spanky77

Hi, well, my DH is progressing. He still lives at home. I am his wife and 24/7 caregiver. Questions: I’m having trouble finding outside male caregivers to come on and help at our home just occasionally. My DH has incontinence/restroom problems, and a lot of folks don’t want to deal with that.  Any suggestions where I might call for hiring help? I’ve tried care.com and The VA. I’ve checked with medical offices, too  

Also, what is with grunting noises and other similar animal type sounds coming from my DH?  Happens a lot middle of night. 

Thanks.  I hope everyone hanging in there. It is the cruelest thing I’ve ever experienced in a loved  one. 

Sincerely,

Spanky 

Ed1937

Hi Spanky. First, I would ask why you are focusing on a male caregiver? A woman might be easier to find. Someone here suggested that it might be a good idea to check with nursing homes to see if they might have caregivers interested in a part time job. They should already have had background checks, so that might give you some peace of mind.

Stuck in the middle

I don't know what causes the noises, unless it is something like the shrill noises small children make when they are trying to learn to talk, but it is not uncommon in AD.

A friend with AD progressed to the stage where he could speak only one- or two-word sentences, such as "Where she?" when he couldn't find his wife.  He would frequently say "Eh!" loudly, for no apparent reason, and I could see his wife flinch whenever it happened.  I told her it sounded to me like he was starting to sing an old song that began "A-a-men, A-a-men, amen, amen."  She said she would try to think of it that way, it was better than thinking "Dammit" every time.

Spanky77

Thank you. You’re right, it doesn’t matter if man or woman as long as my DH doesn’t get scared or embarrassed if she has to clean him up after an accident. It’a hard to explain.  My DH almost afraid of me when I help him (sad), but I will keep this option in mind.  Thanks