Moving day looms for mom

Fairyland

doom and gloom atmosphere continues. Now she is insisting on washing and drying all her blankets. Instead of sorting out all the junk on top of both dressers.

The movers called and said they are doing it at 3-5 not 8-9 tomorrow but that’s ok she doesn’t need to move in until Saturday, right? 

Me. Um no you are taking her bed, as we just discussed how you need to take it apart and set it up there. And all her clothes, etc. 

Oh and the family unpacks everything.

Me: Um no the family is me, alone, and I have a bad back. 

Oh but we will charge per hour.

Me: Fine, I need the help more than I need the money.

Hope they are efficient, and/or willing to work late on a Friday!

mommyandme (m&m)

Moving is so difficult without all the add-ons! 

I really hope things run smoothly for you both. So sorry!

abc123

Dear Fairyland, I have discovered that dealing with other people, like movers, phone company, etc. are extremely difficult. They have no idea what you are going through being a caregiver and I feel like they really don't care. I'm sorry they are giving you a hard time. I hope the move goes smoothly for you both. Please keep us posted. Good luck.

May flowers

Ugh! I hope the move goes smoothly. I know you will be so relieved when it’s all done and she’s settled in.

The moving company that moved an entire MC unit to a new facility did not unpack or set up their furniture! And there was not enough staff to take it on. There were a few of us with LOs who ended up getting everyone settled. That was crazy

SusanB-dil

Ugh - hope all goes better than you anticipate!

May Flowers - that was just wrong of them! They did not 'complete' the move in any professional manner, way, or form.  seems to me that was unethical.

Fairyland - again - hope it goes smoothly and i hope they step up and help like they should.

Fairyland

Thanks all for the support and commiseration. I have been given to understand that I am lucky to get any movers since everyone is going crazy to move house now.  But, I will be optimistic that they will be understanding and try to do a good job - they come recommended as a company frequently used by the facility.

Meanwhile mum is occupied for hours packing her bathroom stuff, then taking a shower so needing to dig half of the items back out. I put the towels and sheets in the chests or drawers that will be moved, and gathering up toilet paper etc. And she is like, “What? They don’t supply towels and toilet paper?”

I have such a headache!  I think I will go and get some takeout for lunch, to cheer me up!  The diet starts once Mum is out of the house and I can go back to my healthy rabbit food (she needs more calories).

My workplace has been so understanding, some of them have recent experience and/or recent babies with house moves on top, so do have a clue.

I did have one excellent guy on the phone when I had to deal with I think a credit card fraud (so many problems I can’t remember which!), he was so nice and really understanding, and thanked me for taking care of my parent! Must have been sadly experienced.

Whenever I think, do I REALLY need to put her in a home, I always find something like the house door left unlocked, or get another “robocall blocked” message on my cellphone. There was just no stopping her answering every single call and doing whatever they said!!

ChHodge

So sorry for you. But you're doing the right thing. It'll be better for you both. 

I'm so wanted to ask you about the movers. Did you hire a company or asked someone for help? 

GothicGremlin

I know I'm really late to this thread, but I can add a small two cents, mostly for future use.

When we moved my mom-in-law from her home to independent living (on the east coast), we used a company called Caring Transitions (I think they're a franchise).  They weren't cheap, but they packed everything, moved everything, set up her one bedroom apartment, hung all of the photos, they even arranged her mineral and shell collections onto shelves. And they did it in a day. I was impressed.

When we moved my sister into memory care (on the west coast), we used them again, although we didn't need all of the extras that my mom-in-law needed (like, no shell collection, for example). They ended up getting rid of the junk, excess furniture, etc., for us.

caregiving daughter

You are doing your best and making the decision that is in the best interest of your loved one. You cannot predict dangerous instances that could have happened. I had to write several down several things that had actually happened and once I did so, and read and reread, it was very clear that the decision needed to be made.

​fesk

I hope the move goes as smoothly as possible, Fairyland.

AyaanWhitney

ChHodge wrote:

So sorry for you. But you're doing the right thing. It'll be better for you both. 

I'm so wanted to ask you about the movers. Did you hire a company or asked someone for help? 

It's always better to hire someone reliable. As you can see at https://expomovers.com/what-are-the-risks-of-hiring-super-cheap-movers/, there are some reasons why you should hire professionals rather than go for cheap movers. Especially when you have special needs.

M1

Thread is from April

Vilmaeliasen

Moving can be such a pain, but it sounds like you've got a lot on your plate with your mom's move. Washing and drying blankets seem like a procrastination tactic, but maybe it's helping her feel more in control of things.  Moving is such a stressful time, and it sucks that you're the only family member available to help. Have you thought about hiring extra help for unpacking? I know it can be pricey, but it might be worth it to save your back and sanity. I've used https://doortodoormover.com/ before and they offer a packing and unpacking service that might be worth looking into.