My son’s speech at the funeral

RanchersWife

We cared for my mil for almost 5 years. My almost 14 year old son spoke after the funeral Mass. He held up three pieces of paper. Each had all of our names on it. He said the first piece was our family. We are all together and “on the same page.” He took the second piece and folded it in half. He said this was us after his Grandpa died 5 years ago. We were a little bent but we were still together. Then he took the third piece and crumpled it into a ball. He said this is what happened when Grandma got dementia. He pointed out that the paper is not pretty or neat anymore. That paper will never look the way it did 6 years ago. The same goes for our family. BUT we are closer together on that ball and that paper can’t be ripped or torn apart like a regular piece of paper. The same goes for our family. It was very powerful and many of us were blown away. My husband cried.

My takeaway from this is that while dementia caregiving with young children is hard and will affect them for the rest of their lives, it does have value. Children do not need to be protected from sad and hard things that are regular parts of life. They need to be able to understand what is happening and how their family is going to deal with it. They need to understand that sometimes other people come first and that there is honor in sacrificing and caring for someone who has loved them their whole lives. 

sandwichone123

That's beautiful. Thank you for sharing that. You must be so proud of him, with that caring and insight.

Mint

Thank you for sharing

toolbeltexpert

RW you must be so proud of your son. I am a illustration kinda guy. That was very good. And I can tell where he gets it from. Thanks for sharing. May God continue to comfort you and your family.

SusanB-dil

Wow!  that's rather profound. Seems like a very understanding young man!  I know you are rightfully proud of him.  Peace and God Bless to each of you. And thank you so much for sharing that.

abc123

Dear RW, I agree with you 100%. We should not hide real life from our children. I think your sons are fortunate. How is your husband doing? You are all in my prayers. I hope you are all doing as well as possible. 

Thank you for sharing this story with us. It's priceless.

Battlebuddy

   That was beautiful. It made me cry. Such a wise young man. It seems like he learned some truly important lessons during this season.  I like what you said about sometimes others come first. 

   But I’m also really happy your taking them to Disney world! That’s an important lesson too - that your time will come when mom and kids get to just have fun together! 

   

mommyandme (m&m)

Full body chills on that one! Wow! Thank you for sharing. 

Well done mom! and Dad and Grandma! 

Still sorry for your loss and heartaches. 

Iris L.

Your son has wisdom.  Thanks for sharing!

Iris

GothicGremlin

Wow, what a thoughtful teen! He's a good one.

Love&Light

Just wow, RW. You must be so proud. Thank you for sharing this.

wyoming daughter

thank you for sharing, that brings tears to my eyes.  Wisdom beyond his years.  HUGS

eaglemom

That is something you will cherish forever. I've reread it several times, and each time I'm blown away by the depth and meaning your shared at the funeral. Wow. Thank you for sharing it.

eagle

Gig Harbor

Wow you raised an amazing young man! Be proud!!!