we really need help!

eddbok

hi, i have not found any information regarding any kind of help with our problem. 

Let me tell you my story.

I'm a 36 years old man, I came to US almost 6 years ago running away from the dictatorship that rules my country venezuela. I am only child, i got an engineering bachelor and brought my mom with me.

My mom is the one in despair, sadly. She got a severe mental illness that mostly of professional do not know what type of illness it is, but some say would be schizoaffective and bipolar disorder.

Since we got here i tried to seek for help for my mom, at first we went to a community health center and there was when the nightmare started.  They gave my mom a medication that made her worst ever and from there she went to Jackson Memorial Behavioral Center as inpatient around 8-9 times within 12 months span. 

We were staying at my mom's brother house until they kicked us out due to how bad my mom was and they just could not take it anymore, so here we are homeless with only $400 in miami florida just when hurricane irma hit us. We went to a temporary shelter and then i could fine a homeless shelter to stay for a while. 

I worked as hard as i could during 6 months with several parallel jobs to try to get us out of there - i appreciated the help but in those kind of places you better be prepare to see EVERYTHING.

The story is to long, but long story short, we got out of there but my mom health just got worse and worse.

So, here i am, trying to put into words a little bit of what we've been through.

My mom still lives with me, but she needs some kind of nursing home or ALF who could take care of her because i have to leave her alone to go out and work to provide us food and shelter and her medications. 

I have found her sometimes in very badly situations because she could not behaves properly while she was alone, so many falls and so many risks so far ,and lastly and the reason i'm looking so desperately help now is because last week she almost die at home chocking while she was taking lunch.

 So, i'm just trying to look for some guidance with this problem. She does not have any government benefits, no pension, she is 60 years old and we're not citizen and still in our immigration process.

I need to place her in a home facility that could provide her with cares that i mostly of the time just can't because i have to work or so and cannot be with her all the time.

So, if you got until this point and read this and you know about any kind of help, advise, guidance or know somebody that could help us somehow i would be more than welcome to hear and know about.

Thank you 

Kind Regards           

ButterflyWings

You sound like a very strong person. Your mother is blessed to have such a caring son. She cannot be left alone without risking disaster. If medication like Seroqul was available to help manage her problem behaviors caused by dementia, trauma, and/or other possible mental health issues do you think family might take you both back? 

I do not know what resources there may be for emigrating refugees. Hopefully you can call the Alz 24/7 helpline to ask a care consultant to help you with ideas. It is free, and can be anonymous if you prefer.  

The Solution Center (see tabs at the top of this page) provides links to Alzheimer’s Association resources and topic sheets that can help answer many of the questions a diagnosis creates. For additional information or assistance, call our 24/7 Helpline, anytime day or night at 800.272.3900. 

Just in case bilingual materials would be helpful, here is a link. Good luck to you both!

 http://www.alz.org/espanol/overview-espanol.asp

Jo C.

eddbok, welcome to you; I can understand the severe challenges you are facing.  What is needed is help from a professional source.

The National Alliance On Mental Illness, ("NAMI"), may be able to assist.  They have a hot line that you can contact for information and services. I think this is a key link for the issues you are facing:   Here is their link:

https://www.nami.org/findsupport

In some states, there will be insurance benefits through Medicaid for uninsured people and some states have such services for non-citizens.  Florida does have Medicaid benefits for non-citizens; and I think that may be the state you are living in.  Your mother is disabled by a severe mental illness and her income would be low to near non-existent.  Here is a link discussing criteria for Florida Medicaid for non-citizens:

https://www.benefits.gov/benefit/162h5

 The Alzheimer's Assn. has a Helpline that is available 24 hours, 365 days a year.  It can be reached at (800) 272-3900.  If you call, ask to be transferred to a Care Consultant.  There are no fees for this service.   Consultants are highly educated Social Workers who specialize in dementia and family dynamics.  They have much information and can often assist us with our problem solving. They may have a listing of places for you to contact regarding assistance.

When your mother was hospitalized for her mental condition, I wonder if you spoke to the Psychiatric Social Worker(s) at the hospital.  If so; were they of any assistance?  If not, or if you did not discuss the living situation, you can also give them a call and ask for any contacts for referrals that may possibly be helpful.

You are a kind and caring son; I am truly sorry that you are struggling with such a problem.  I send you best wishes that you will soon be able to find a solution for your mother's need for a place that can provide care for her significant needs.

J.

mommyandme (m&m)

In the short term, would an adult day care center be an option for her to go to while you’re at work?  Many have scholarships and/or accept Medicaid.

live in daughter

agree- would look into religious organizations- some have Adult Day Care Centers or may know of resources that may help your Mom

eddbok

thanks for your response! i do appreciate it! god bless you

eddbok

Thanks for all that info. i really appreciate any kind of help.

To answer one of your questions, i haven't found any social worker that can actually help us or really want it to, in most cases they've been seeing us as a hopeless case even when i have screamed out loud and begged for help. It is really frustrating. 

But i'll keep trying. I'll go through all this info! thank you once again. God bless you and your loved ones 

eddbok

ButterflyWings wrote:

You sound like a very strong person. Your mother is blessed to have such a caring son. She cannot be left alone without risking disaster. If medication like Seroqul was available to help manage her problem behaviors caused by dementia, trauma, and/or other possible mental health issues do you think family might take you both back? 

I do not know what resources there may be for emigrating refugees. Hopefully you can call the Alz 24/7 helpline to ask a care consultant to help you with ideas. It is free, and can be anonymous if you prefer.  

The Solution Center (see tabs at the top of this page) provides links to Alzheimer’s Association resources and topic sheets that can help answer many of the questions a diagnosis creates. For additional information or assistance, call our 24/7 Helpline, anytime day or night at 800.272.3900. 

Just in case bilingual materials would be helpful, here is a link. Good luck to you both!

 http://www.alz.org/espanol/overview-espanol.asp

thanks for your response! i do appreciate it! god bless you

eddbok

Jo C. wrote:

eddbok, welcome to you; I can understand the severe challenges you are facing.  What is needed is help from a professional source.

The National Alliance On Mental Illness, ("NAMI"), may be able to assist.  They have a hot line that you can contact for information and services. I think this is a key link for the issues you are facing:   Here is their link:

https://www.nami.org/findsupport

In some states, there will be insurance benefits through Medicaid for uninsured people and some states have such services for non-citizens.  Florida does have Medicaid benefits for non-citizens; and I think that may be the state you are living in.  Your mother is disabled by a severe mental illness and her income would be low to near non-existent.  Here is a link discussing criteria for Florida Medicaid for non-citizens:

https://www.benefits.gov/benefit/162h5

 The Alzheimer's Assn. has a Helpline that is available 24 hours, 365 days a year.  It can be reached at (800) 272-3900.  If you call, ask to be transferred to a Care Consultant.  There are no fees for this service.   Consultants are highly educated Social Workers who specialize in dementia and family dynamics.  They have much information and can often assist us with our problem solving. They may have a listing of places for you to contact regarding assistance.

When your mother was hospitalized for her mental condition, I wonder if you spoke to the Psychiatric Social Worker(s) at the hospital.  If so; were they of any assistance?  If not, or if you did not discuss the living situation, you can also give them a call and ask for any contacts for referrals that may possibly be helpful.

You are a kind and caring son; I am truly sorry that you are struggling with such a problem.  I send you best wishes that you will soon be able to find a solution for your mother's need for a place that can provide care for her significant needs.

J.

Thanks for all that info. i really appreciate any kind of help.

To answer one of your questions, i haven't found any social worker that can actually help us or really want it to, in most cases they've been seeing us as a hopeless case even when i have screamed out loud and begged for help. It is really frustrating. 

But i'll keep trying. I'll go through all this info! thank you once again. God bless you and your loved ones 

eddbok

thanks to every single one of you that have read my post and left also a response. God bless you all.

jmlarue

Call the Florida Statewide Elder Care helpline at: 1-800-96-ELDER

This should connect you with a local of regional agency that can assist with elderly care option for Medicaid qualified individuals. 

Jo C.

I apologize for getting this to you late . . . my computer broke down and it was in repairt. 

You are looking for a good care environment for your mother.  There are Group Homes that accept people with dementia or mental health issues.

Group Homes are like a regular home that care for about six adults.  Some are women only, others are mixed women and men.  Some specialize in dementia, and there are group homes tha specialize in people who have been diagnosed with mental health issues.

You may want to speak to any social workers you come into contact with about this. Many of these accept Medicaid, so that would be a plus if your mother can qualify for that benefit.

If you have time, let us know how you and your mother are doing, we will be thinking of you and of course, sending our best wishes,

J.

eddbok

Jo C. wrote:

I apologize for getting this to you late . . . my computer broke down and it was in repairt. 

You are looking for a good care environment for your mother.  There are Group Homes that accept people with dementia or mental health issues.

Group Homes are like a regular home that care for about six adults.  Some are women only, others are mixed women and men.  Some specialize in dementia, and there are group homes tha specialize in people who have been diagnosed with mental health issues.

You may want to speak to any social workers you come into contact with about this. Many of these accept Medicaid, so that would be a plus if your mother can qualify for that benefit.

If you have time, let us know how you and your mother are doing, we will be thinking of you and of course, sending our best wishes,

J.

no worries, nothing to be apologized for. Sadly, my mom does not qualify for that benefit. As we speak my mom is in icu she got a severe low blood pressure problem, i've asked to speak with a social worker there.

Thanks a lot for your help and prayers.   

VKB

I prayed for you and your mother.  I admire your loyalty to your mother. Pray, have faith, because God is faithful.  He wants your prayer and faith in Him.  Peace to you both.

glmamm

just as a suggestion, maybe look for a job in a care facility that you can place your mom in.  Definitely check into medicaid/medicare.  she is most likely eligible.