Black mood

David J

Sometimes I just get very down and in a black mood. I have been listening to music today instead of watching cable news. A favorite old song came on and I tealized it now has a new meaning. 

I see a red door
And I want it painted black
No colors anymore
I want them to turn black

I see the girls walk by
Dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my headt
Until my darkness goes

I see a line of cars
And they're all painted black
With flowers and my love
Both never to come back

I've seen people turn their heads
And quickly look away
Like a newborn baby
It just happens everyday

I look inside myself
And see my heart is black
I see my red door
I must have it painted black

Maybe then, I'll fade away
And not have to face the facts
It's not easy facing up
When your whole world is black

No more will my green sea
Go turn a deeper blue
I could not foresee this thing
Happening to you

If I look hard enough
Into the setting sun
My love will laugh with me
Before the morning comes

I see a red door
And I want it painted black
No colors anymore
I want them to turn black

I see the girls walk by
Dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head
Until my darkness goes

I wanna see it painted
Painted black
Black as night
Black as coal
I wanna see the sun
Blotted out from the sky
I wanna see it painted, painted, painted
Painted black, yeah

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Jagger Mick / Richard Keith

Paint It, Black lyrics © Mirage Music Int. Ltd. C/o Essex Music Int. L

storycrafter

I hear you, David. Thank you for posting the song lyrics and sharing about your feeling. It speaks for me, too.

I'm in a place, for a while now, that I have lost the inclination/gumption/energy to post much; used to quite a bit, but not in recent years. I greatly appreciate everyone who does share; very helpful, relief to know others are out here who understand.

Sending healing wishes....

Jeff86

I’m sorry the dark clouds have descended, David.   Totally understandable. And no question, we reinterpret songs through our AD experience.  An undesirable but inevitable filter. Hope the mood lifts soon.

David J

Just wanted to tell you that I’m better today. Not completely, but somewhat better. It is so hard to find happiness when half of you is in memory care. I am on the outside, she is on the inside, and we are nowhere together. Other than that, I’m fine!

Pat6177

David, thanks for the update. Glad to hear it’s a bit better. Hang in there.

toolbeltexpert

David you're not alone. The past few days have taken a toll on me. I have been feeling no joy. I have had thoughts of drugs to self medicate, which I know are not gonna help me. I get up every day and try my best, it's just like there is no end to this. I am glad to hear you're feeling better and I know I will too. I just wanted to chime in with the thoughts I need to deal with. Thanks for sharing.

Ed1937

David, I'm sorry you had such a bad day yesterday, but glad it is somewhat better now. When we're feeling down, we have to remember that those feelings are temporary. Feelings always change, whether good or bad.