Another minor update

Ed1937

I just got a call from a nurse at MC. She said my wife was walking the halls, and was severely confused. She had no idea where she was. The aide just went into her room to check things out. She is sleeping now, and if she's anything like she was at home, that means she will sleep until morning. They also asked me to bring a wheelchair and a walker for her, and they will try to get therapy to help her learn to use the walker, since she had problems with it before. Of course this won't happen until she gets her bearings back, which I hope and pray won't be long. I really miss having her at home. It's not home anymore.

Quilting brings calm

Possible delirium from the hospital and now the move to MC.  It could take several weeks.

Ed1937

That's what I was afraid of.

Quilting brings calm

On the other hand… she’s been there 36 hours. Realistically, as a dementia patient - how much can she actually know about where she is after 36 hours when she’s in a place she never saw before yesterday?   Maybe she will settle in sooner rather than later.    Don’t put too much stock in either of my opinions

Ed1937

I've seen where someone said their LO went downhill fast after being placed. I'm just hoping it's a temporary thing.

Beachfan

Ed,

The first or second night in MC, my DH was reported to have “fallen” out of bed.  He wasn’t hurt and was helped back into bed by staff.  I immediately panicked, thinking this would become a pattern and he would no longer sleep through the night.  In actuality, I think he woke up, was disoriented, and sat on the floor, not knowing how to get back into bed.  It never happened again.   I hope this was a one time occurrence for your DW and that she settles in soon.  Try not to dwell on what might happen; she is clearly in good hands.  You need to think about your well being now, and try to rest.  Best wishes.

M1

Ed at least they call you.  I have never yet gotten a call from my partner's facility (in our eighth week now).  I don't know whether that's good or bad--but one way or the other, they are handling things without communication with me.  I have asked for regular progress reports but am still not getting them.  And a request to communicate with other family members resulted in one email contact, which has also now gone quiet.  I feel so isolated, I hope you don't have that experience.

We're going to try for a visit on Tuesday--with friends, I still can't go alone, she focuses way too much on me and wanting to leave.

Keep us posted on how she does, I hope she acclimates easily.

White Crane

Ed, I hope she can get her bearings soon...for her sake and for yours.  My DH is still at home so I can't really know what you are going through but I can imagine.  Praying for both of you.

Brenda

Ed1937

Good news today! One of our daughters went to see her this morning, and she said her mother was not confused at all, and was in pretty good spirits. She only mentioned one time about going home, and she thinks she is going home tomorrow. She also mentioned one time about my girlfriend. I never thought I'd welcome hearing her talk about my girlfriend, but that just means she is much better than she was last night. She asked our daughter when I would be up to see her. I think I'll give it some time before I try to see her again. At this point, I'm pretty sure it would not wind up very well.

I haven't been able to work outside much at all because I had to be with her. The landscaping island I made for her four years ago was overrun by weeds, and there was a lot of other work to be done in the flower beds, as well as weed whacking. I started to work on it a little today, when one of our neighbors told me he had to go get some cigarettes, and he would be back in about fifteen minutes to give me a hand. So he, one of our sons, and I worked for about 2 hours getting the place to begin to look like someone actually lived there. Not done yet, but more help coming. I've always been blessed with good neighbors. That's priceless! I'd rather live in our neighborhood than live in a very high scale neighborhood with bad neighbors.

jfkoc

wonderful news!

Stuck in the middle

I've noticed that people with good neighbors usually are good neighbors themselves.

toolbeltexpert

Ed I know your glad with that good report, and I wondered if you were gonna give it a little time? I want to say when I used to visit mcf sometimes family would be there and I might get to know them a little,but I sure missed how hard it was on them. I remember I wouldn't see a lo visit a lot but I did notice it wasn't always joyful for the pwd. I understand much better now.  And with Dementia it's always going home tomorrow. .

Getting yard work done is a battle sounds like you have Gideon army coming. Just enough to do the job.

I have good neighbors as well and it's good we can count on each other. Chainsaws and  good fences make good neighbors. Several neighbors have fire rings and no trees, so every now and then I use my tractor to cleanup the trails on my place and bring it to them. 

Ed1937

M1 wrote:

Ed at least they call you.  

Well........kind of. This was her first night there, and I wanted some feedback. I was told to call the facility, and ask for the 2nd floor nursing station. I called throughout the day, 5 times, but never got an answer from the nursing station. Later in the day, I talked to our daughter (also POA), and told her that it was useless to try to get them to answer. She decided to call, and she got through on the first try! She asked the nurse to call me, otherwise I probably wouldn't have gotten a call either. 

We're going to try for a visit on Tuesday--with friends, I still can't go alone, she focuses way too much on me and wanting to leave.

I'm sorry it has been so hard for you. I expect the same reaction from my wife, but I'm hoping for a quicker settlement there. I'm not going to visit for a while.

ImMaggieMae

Ed, it’s only been a short time, so I wouldn’t be surprised that she is disoriented. I hope that changes quickly as she settles in. Your daughter’s report sounds positive. I’m so glad you are getting things done and staying busy around the house, and especially that you have neighbors who are helping and supporting you. Prayers that she settles in soon and that you can visit and she’ll be calm.