What A Night

AnnMB

DH has had 2 wonderful days. He has joked and laughed and enjoyed everything we've done. It was a delight to do things with him even if some of it was on his schedule. It was nice that he could be outside on his own and monitored less frequently.

Last night he went to bed and woke up once to the bathroom. He turned on the lights and put his pipe and tobacco into his bedside table so it would be safe. He asked about his health care card and I said it was in its safe place. He got back into bed and went to sleep.

Just before midnight he bolted out of bed saying he had to get the cows in so he could milk them. People were not doing their job and why did he have to do all the work. He went through his drawer for socks and got 2 pairs out. They were slung around the room and he put on his old socks. I handed him a shirt when he demanded it. He was ranting on about milking the cows and calling the police. I tried to get him to sit with me so we could make a plan about things. No way. So while he dressed, I called our son. I figured it was better to have them here earlier rather than later when he was trying to get outside or pushing me around. I thought it might calm him down faster if they got here when it just started.

When son and daughter-in-law arrived they told him it was dark outside, there were no cars or people around. He told them a different story than what he woke up with and then looked at me and said I could leave now. He didn't know where he was or who I was.  At that point, we all talked about the house, how long we've lived here, etc. We reassured him that he didn't need to work, the cows were asleep until morning in their barn, and how well he was doing supervising the yard work here. We talked about him going to their house this evening to have warm cookies and tea. We chatted about everything we could think of. His arm was sore which is common. At nearly 1 a.m. we got him into bed and family went home. He told me he wouldn't sleep as his arm was so sore it was killing him. Five minutes later he was asleep.

He woke this morning knowing something had happened and that family was here along with a lot of other people whom he didn't know. He got up and looked out every window looking for things that are missing. He has been outdoors, in the garage, and downstairs to check for things that are missing. I'm monitoring him closely as I fear he may take off on foot to find the police. He has used a few choice words this morning which I have let roll off my back.

He is sitting at the table, is still a bit delusional but is looking at a good story on the iPad. He isn't staring at everything and seeing very little. Hopefully he is coming out of it. If not, it will be a long day for me. I will be monitoring him closely all day and will try to nap when he does. Family knows it will be a rocky day and will come when I call. I'm hoping that won't happen. He goes there after supper so I can do my grocery shopping.

His sore arm - the doctor has checked him and we think it may be stress related or phantom. I do put Voltaren on it which doesn't really help. He has stress balls to squeeze which helps him relax. When he has a delusion, he has no pain. When we are busy doing things, he has no pain. We aren't sure why it bothers him. A total mystery for all of us.

ButterflyWings

Hi Ann- Oh boy - what a night is right! So glad you have support.

When my DH had some sudden very bizarre ideas and actions it was a silent UTI. Ed had mentioned that many times on these boards so I knew that might be the reason though it made no sense to me. After a day or so it was SO extreme that I hurried to get one of the most reliable test strip brands and held one under his urine stream the next time he had to go. It was flaming purple in a very short time so I was pretty sure. Called his Dr and the neuropsych was very familiar with the pattern and felt comfortable that he was indeed suffering from his first UTI. He and I both messaged the PCP and got an antibiotic scrip started. It is best to get a culture if you can have the urine test done at an urgent care today though. That way you are sure to get the right antibiotic, for the actual bacteria they can identify IF your DH does have a UTI.

No milking cows, but my LO was hallucinating (seeing non-existent people outside trying to break into my car), like your DH did not recognize his spouse (me), was frantically gathering knives, a bat, and big garden tools to waylay the non-existent intruders. The delusions were vivid and dangerous at one point. And yes, he exited the house in the middle of the night to do battle with them. It was a scary time. And happened a couple of times over the next few months (see culture tip above). We also started Seroquel and over time, upped the dosage. My DH is lots better.

Good luck getting this under control quickly. No one can function on zero sleep and caregiving is hard enough without having to call in reinforcements in the wee hours. Also, I thought you were going to say he put the pipe into the nightstand drawer but it wasn't all the way out. Be careful with smoking and bedroom/bedside fire monitoring. Dementia is a trickster. Do the local police know your DH has dementia? May be good to give a heads up if he is likely to be calling, or to be seen with questionable behavior. It will keep everyone safer if they know.

AnnMB

When we see the doctor again, I will ask for another urine test. He had one and it was negative.

He doesn't smoke in the house and hasn't for many, many years. I do monitor matches all the time as they can be dangerous.

I'm not sure if he sees people in his mind or not. He doesn't know who they are. He thinks they steal when we are asleep or out. He keeps the house locked most of the time to keep us safe. Or at least he thinks it's locked. I do a night check and when we go out check to make sure all the doors are locked. He has never gathered knives or tools to hurt anyone.

DH is on Seroquel which we know as Quetiapine. He takes 2 at bedtime and 1 in the morning which is maxium dose. The only thing I can think of that triggered last night's delusion is showing him videos daughter sent of calves drinking out of buckets. Often we can figure out what triggers his delusions but on occasion we shrug our shoulders and move on.

I will be going to the police when I can go alone to give them a heads up that he has dementia. They really do need to know as I may have to call them if family is away like they can be in August. At least they can help calm him when I can't.

Ed1937

Ann, I'm sorry you are dealing with this. That is just terrible. BW gave you some good tips. It's possible that he has a UTI even without typical symptoms, and a UTI can cause serious symptoms that are not typical for UTIs. These are called silent UTIs.

She also mentioned the local police. This is also an excellent tip. They might ask for a recent picture of him, and incorporate that and other information into a database that can be very helpful to them if he should decide to get out by himself, without you knowing about it.

toolbeltexpert

Ann when you said his arm was sore it made me think, my dw is always hitting solid objects. Most times it's her hand that Hurts but sometimes it's her arm. I thought I always knew when she was hitting things, but I reviewed some camera footage and saw her do it. I can't be there every second. That was a good thing you called in family early!  Sorry it was a hard night, maybe today will be better.

David J

Ann, I remember those nights that DW’s delusions were at their worst, and she wouldn’t calm down. Taking clothes out of the closet and drawers and piling them up to take with her (?).  Wanting to call the police because someone had been in the house (not). Yelling at me for not doing anything about the intruder, because I was right there and saw her (total fabrication). I was exhausted wanted to get some sleep, but could not calm her down. This was not a one time occurrence, and only antipsychotics helped. She would still wake up in the middle of the night upset about something, but could not verbalize it. As her dementia got worse, she eventually forgot all about the delusions.

AnnMB

toolbeltexpert wrote:

Ann when you said his arm was sore it made me think, my dw is always hitting solid objects. Most times it's her hand that Hurts but sometimes it's her arm. I thought I always knew when she was hitting things, but I reviewed some camera footage and saw her do it. I can't be there every second. That was a good thing you called in family early!  Sorry it was a hard night, maybe today will be better.

 

He doesn't hit things. He will be fine and then it starts up. I think I can feel a muscle knot in his upper arm but putting Votaren on it doesn't help at all. I think when he is delusional or stressed he unvoluntarily tightens up that arm (right one) causing the muscle to spasm into pain. He then keeps tightening it up causing more pain. 

Other than pain in his arm and being tired, he has had a good day. Out to look at the plants in the garden, slowly reading a book, napping for an hour this morning, and visiting with me in the sewing room. He has eaten well which is good. He can shovel the food in his mouth with that sore arm. No problem.

He's out to family tonight as I am grocery shopping and then to bed early for him. He needs his rest as do I.

Continuing Care called and an agency has picked him up. Will find out the particulars of how many times per week, hours here and time of day in the next few days. They will send out an RN to do an assessment and get us to fill out the paper work. It will be good for him to have a "friend" visit while I am out to shop or in the sewing room sewing or making frozen dinners, etc.

Crushed

Just for Humor

One night DW sat bolt upright in bed and
started crying saying It was important and I forgot it  over and over 

 then she said do you know what it was ?

I said  yes, you forgot to kiss me good night !  

Oh she said and kissed me and went back to sleep.   

now that is diversion  
 
 
  

toolbeltexpert

Ann it's good to hear about getting pick up by an agency I am sure the help will give you the break you need. 

Crushed thanks for the humor,sounds like a love story. I wish everything ended like that.