Newly diagnosed mom won’t speak to me

Shannon4969

Hello!

My mom was ‘diagnosed’ in April - I’m Canadian, and because of covid the wait times to get her in to a specialist are extremely long. My family doctor is 95% it’s Alzheimer’s, so I’m going forward with that. She has not been told that she has Alzheimer’s, just that she has some cognitive impairments. (By our family doctor)

Right now the majority of her symptoms are short term memory related. She’s still making new memories, but can’t recall something she was just told.

In the last two weeks she has been increasingly difficult to deal with. She’s yelling at her neighbours for making noise in the middle of the day, yelling at people in restaurants for talking, and yelling at my dad and I - a lot. She sends me at least 4 texts a day that I’m a terrible person, that she no longer wants to speak to me, and that she wants my dad to move out. He is the sweetest man with endless patience, and I’ve never seen her act like this. 

Is this normal? Is there anything I can do about it? 

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

SusanB-dil

Hi Shannon4969 - Welcome to 'here'...  but sorry you are dealing with this

Yes - if it is dementia, Alz or another form, this can be normal.  There are medications that can mitigate the agitation, which help a lot.  However, other things should be ruled out, such as any vitamin deficiency or especially a possible UTI. 

Do not take the insults personally, and do not try to reason.  I know the insults are so hurtful, and it is hard not to take it personal, but with dementia, it does help to remember that they cannot help it.

M1

Welcome Shannon.  While waiting for a specialist appointment, I would definitely report the troublesome behaviors--with no words minced--to her primary care doc and see if they are willing to prescribe something to help.  it almost certainly will take medication, and life is probably just as unpleasant for her as it is for the rest of you right now.  Docs vary in their comfort levels, but a lot of primary care folks are going to be familiar with things like this and may be able to help while you wait.  Doesn't hurt to ask.  And if you are the squeaky wheel, maybe there is something they can do to speed up the specialty consultation.  Good luck---

Shannon4969

She’s had blood work done - no signs of infection or vitamin deficiency. She also had a CT - no signs of stroke, no lesions, or abnormalities.

She’s currently on anti-depressants and anti-anxiety medications - the same ones she’s been on for years. My family doctor isn’t comfortable prescribing anything else.

She actually called me tonight - sounds like her normal self, falling over herself apologizing. She remembers being so awful to us, but can’t explain why. Just that she was angry for no specific reason.

The clinic she’s waiting to get into has been notified by our family doctor and our local Alzheimer’s association about her aggression - hopefully it moves her up the list a little bit.

Thank you guys so much for your input.