How often do you do assessments?

oehlsena

My local Aging Matters sent me a "caregiving guide for unprofessionals" which emphasizes allowing a LO to do everything that they can do themselves, by themselves, and then to apply a "hand-under-hand" approach towards activities that they can't fulfill themselves. This guide also emphasized setting up an area before bringing the LO into- laying out all necessary supplies so that they can immediately begin the task. 

One thing I've been doing for my LO the past year is brushing her hair every day. After reading the guide I was sent, I started to think about what she can still do herself. I realized that there have been some things that she has shown aptitude for that I had taken over doing for her simply because of a lack of patience with her. These included: brushing her teeth (to an extent), administering medications directly to her mouth, and wiping her after she uses the loo. These are all things that she can't do all the time due to confusion. It really takes a lot of patience to coax her into doing these tasks.

So, what I've been doing is being upfront about handing her her hairbrush/toothbrush/toilet paper/pill and giving her verbal instruction. We also have gotten her a bib, so she can often take over feeding herself now even though it does get messy and she does need assistance with monitoring. 

Can you believe when I handed her the hairbrush and told her to brush her own hair, she seemed agitated and made a remark about how she will because "nobody else is going to do it for her"?

Our only loss so far is a toothbrush getting dropped in the toilet.... but she needed a new one anyways and is happier with the new one. 

Edit: Oh, and what I forgot to mention is that I have daily been asking her for help folding laundry this week. She has not been able to do it at all and seems exhausted at the thought, but I am going to continue with asking because I have really enjoyed seeing how she does and, although I don't expect progression, it seems to really lift our moods to include her in these tasks. I also want to start having her wipe the table after we eat which she has been able to do herself multiple times before. She also has two boxes of packaged photos in the garage that I thought we could start trying to scrapbook. They need to be sanitized from mouse poop first, however, despite that, she has shown such a genuine enjoyment in her photographs that I think with enough patience that scrapbooking could be something we can do together- or maybe I can "do" for her while she watches. She already explained that she wants them in chronological order.

This is pretty much a followup to my last post about "how to keep her from boredom." Thank you for all your meaningful replies. 

May flowers

This is very helpful post, and I, glad you found some things to keep her busy!

 I know too many times I just do everything because we are limited in time. But on a good day, I can hand him his toothbrush, and he will try a little (mostly just brushing one tooth) and then I finish, same with the shaver. He kind of goes through the motions, but I do think he likes it. He likes to feed himself and I have to be patient with that too because it take a really long time, but I just keep reminding him his food/spoon is there. 

Toileting is another matter here because he cannot wipe, at all! He’s mostly going in diapers anyway.

I wish we could do photos, but he cannot see them anymore, but we have found there are other things he can do that are tactile, today we got out his bowling trophies to hold. He likes to handle/feel things like that.

Joydean

Thank you for sharing this information. I have been reading about independence for people w/dementia. It also talked about how we (caregiver) try so hard to make things easier for our love ones, that we don’t think about what we are doing to them. The writer used the example of children learning how to feed their self, yes they do make a mess but before long they are eating more and dropping less, becoming independent. PWD, are going backwards, they are loosing that ability, the faster we take over for them, the quicker they unlearn and sadly will never be able to get it back. Therefore they loose any ability and have no independence left. I can only speak for myself, I thought I was “helping “ , I had never thought that in some way I was hurting! Example, I had noticed my dh struggle to cut up some of his food, so I started “helping), I cut it up! He would sit and wait for me to do, now I tell him to try, he smiles and gets to it! He even told me thank you! I wanted to cry, but not in front of him.  Yes he is very messy, he has more food on his hands, clothes, table, but he is smiling and eating every bit that didn’t hit the floor! More work for me, but seeing him smile and feeling satisfied with himself, it’s worth it.  

I know this want work for everyone and I don’t know how long it will last. Each person is just trying the best we can, and each of our love ones are at different stages. My dh is late 5, early 6.  

Iris L.

oehlsena wrote:

s before. She also has two boxes of packaged photos in the garage that I thought we could start trying to scrapbook. They need to be sanitized from mouse poop first,  

You are doing great to accommodate her changes!

Are you in a hanta virus area?  Mice can carry hanta virus.

Iris L.