The Alzheimers long haul

Crushed

It is now four full years since DW had the slightest idea who I was or who her children and grandchildren are. Even at that time she had no meaningful  speech.  She can still walk and chew but that is it. She is 70.  She is otherwise healthy and looks lovely.  Takes no medication except seroquel when needed.  She likes chocolate ice cream and chocolate cake.   

The lovely woman I shared my life with is long gone .  Her pensions and retirement funds pay for her care.  She will go on like this until she dies.

piozam13

I feel sorry for you.  I would rather be dead than live like this.  Is there something that can be done/

Beachfan

Ditto, ditto, ditto.  But maybe not quite 4 years yet for non recognition.  I stopped counting; who cares?  Piozam, there is little to be done.  I find that living in the moment and looking for life’s little pleasures helps.  There is nothing to gain from wallowing.  My mantra: “At least I’m not in Ukraine.”

Sligo177

Crushed,

That's a sad anniversary for you to think of.  I am sorry.  I'm glad she is healthy, and beautiful.  I am sure you think back to when she was fully with you.  Maybe you can have some good memories of those times.  I am not there yet, and I know it's going to be tough.  Prayers for you, and her. 

Crushed

Sligo177 wrote:

 Maybe you can have some good memories of those times.

Perhaps it wouldn't hurt so much if the memories were less spectacular!  
I first kissed her on a curb in 1972.   

Wonder Woman

KathyF1

Aww that is so sweet Crushed. I think it’s the life you’ve lived that matters, not how it ends. That said, I am so sorry she is so young and going down this path. And I’m sad for you. But what a blessing that you’ve shared such a wonderful life together.

Paris20

Crushed, the pain can be unbearable at times. It’s hard not to become nostalgic when the memories are wonderful. I remember asking my husband if he’d promise to take me to France every year for the rest of our lives. Well, in a way he kept that promise because the husband I first met exactly 60 years ago this week, who took me to France for 21 years in a row, is no longer living. He breathes, he eats, but the rest is gone.

storycrafter

Crushed, it's incomprehensible what it's come to. My heart weeps for you and your DW. May you dwell in your gratitude for all those wonderful memories and take comfort there. I don't know how one does that while their LO is still here on Earth in body, but not mind. Nevertheless I wish you peace and comfort and strength and glimpses of light and goodness in all your days.

Have you written down your memories of your life together? You've shared many wonderful stories and anecdotes I've enjoyed and appreciated immensely over the years here, even the tough ones. I hope you've collected them all for your progeny.

RGF

I feel so sorry for you.  

Thank you for your post.  Your words have lifted me out of wallowing in our alz problems. 

DH is at the beginning-ish (stage 3-4. Alz/PCA) of his/our journey.  DH and I can still have fun together but I’ve been  emotionally  distancing myself  from him to protect  myself.  

Your words remind me that now is not the time to distance while we can still dance.  

His father had it 30 Yrs ago, but we were certain there would be a cure before now. 

Thank you. 

Jo C.

There is no way to measure such a loss; it is beyond being able to quantify; I am so very sorry for the continuing pain.

I wonder; are you home in the states now or are you still moseying around Europe?  If in Europe, how has the heat been . . . and did you find AC in  all or any of your hotels? 

J.