Seeking Advice(3)

ACaregiver24

Good Day Everyone! A little bit about me before I get into why I am here.  I am an only child and a single mother to a teenager and I work full-time.  I am struggling with trying to adjust and balance life with my mother's diagnosis.   My mother (67) was recently diagnosed with AD/VD (I put both AD/VD because her primary care doc calls it VD but the neurologist says it AD) in February 2022.  She was prescribed Donepezil and Memantine right after she was diagnosed.  For the first few months she was fine meaning she was still doing her normal behavior such as eating, getting dressed, cooking, and taking her meds but I noticed an increase in her weight loss over the past 2 months.  After watching her for a few days I noticed that she wasn't eating.  I contacted her neurologist with my concerns that the meds seem to only be making matters worse and the only advice he gave was to stop giving her the Memantine and only give her half if the Donepezil.   I've made the adjustments in her meds and I am watching to see if the adjustment to her meds help. 

Can anyone give me some ideas of how one can manage being a caregiver to a AD patient?

Also, How do I know what stage she is in? What can be expected as a caregiver during this "journey"? What should I pay close attention to?

Does anyone in the Hampton Roads area (Norfolk) of Virginia have any suggestions for adult daycares or activity centers for AD patients?

I know that was a lot and I apologize for being all over the place but as I stated before I am struggling trying to balance everything.  I do not have any help.  

eapayne1

Hi, welcome, I'm glad you are reaching out.  That sounds funny to me because I am fairly new to this group, too.

It is very difficult to find a balance, and I, too, am in the 'what should I expect?' and 'how do I do this?' category.  

I work full-time and have a family.  I am not an only child, but my sister offers no help or support, and other family members have trickled away as the challenges get more difficult.  My mother is 81yo.  We moved her in with our family about two months ago.  Her PCP diagnosed her dementia but didn't assign a specific stage.  I attached a chart I found on the interwebs (so it is as official as the internet can be ).  It helped me place my mom in the stage 5/6 range.

Take care. I hope this helps a little.

E

SusanB-dil

Hi ACaregiver24 - Welcome to 'here', but sorry for the reason...

We are caring for MIL with AD/VD.  With working and being mom to teen, you sure have your hands full.  Is mom living alone?  Since she is not eating, there are other things that may be going by the wayside as well. And without seeing her for another evaluation, it sounds a bit odd that her doc would just say to drop the meds like that.  Might want to check with them.

alz is bad enough, but vascular can cause dementia to be what I call 'steps', actually a plateau, then another drop, another plateau, another drop...  the plateaus can last anywhere from weeks to months, and also depends on her TIAs (mini-strokes) as to how bad the steps may be.

Do you have DPOA and HIPAA controls?  If not, need that ASAP.

Here are a couple of links that will help understanding the stages.

https://www.alzheimers.net/stages-of-alzheimers-disease/

https://tamcummings.com/stages-of-dementia/

I'm sure others will have suggestions for you.

ACaregiver24

Thank you so much!!! I will take a look at the information you shared.

ACaregiver24

@SusanB-dil:

My mother lives with me.  I spoke to her PCP about her eating changes and she recommended that I give her Ensure or Protein shakes to make sure she's getting some sort of nutrition.  As for the Neurologist she has been referred to a new one.  Her current neuro doesn't listen and I feel like he dismisses me when I ask questions.

Thank you for the information!!

SusanB-dil

You're welcome. 

You can also check 'solutions' tab above and check out the 'Archives' for various topics.  Good for you for changing docs.  Hope you found one who will actually listen to your concerns.