preparing meals(1)

Davegrant

   I am looking for suggestions to help me with my wife's eating habits. I took over the cooking about five years ago. She dislikes almost everything whether at home or in a restaurant. Everything is too hard for her teeth they are not sharp enough, too sweet, too spicy or too salty. She spends most of the day foraging for snacks especially cookies. The one item she does eat is chicken noodle soup which she must not find salty. She also has an acid problem which began after they removed her gallbladder last winter. She is taking omeprazole and the pain from the acid comes on strongly when she forgets or refuses to take the pills. She can't remember the last experience of discomfort. I have tried meals on wheels, we have been to the dentist twice and they have sharpened her teeth. I have had the most success with baking frozen meals like chicken pot pies. She doesn't complain about them. Do I serve the frozen dinners every night? Breakfasts seem ok with cereal, pancakes, and eggs and toast which give us enough variety.

     She is a healthy 86 year old, she has lost only a few pounds over the last several years and the last time we went to the doctor they cut her blood pressure pills in half. Her glucose numbers are not that bad. She says she likes my cooking which is hard for me to understand as I eat what she eats. We actually throw out about one half of the food on her plate. I always eat what is in front of me due to childhood training.

      Suggestions are welcomed and appreciated.

Dave

Ed1937

Dave, you might want to take a look at some of the recipes in this thread. https://www.alzconnected.org/discussion.aspx?g=posts&t=2147542076  

MaryG123

Hi Dave,  I know there are others on the forum who have more experience than I do, but my plan is to fix whatever my DH wants to eat.  If that's frozen dinners and cookies then so be it.  Healthy eating is now "off the table" so to speak.  That being said, I do leave these protein bars sitting around along with a lot of fruit.

 https://www.wellplated.com/peanut-butter-protein-bars/

Hoot619

Thanks Ed, I bookmarked this one. Lots of good ideas, with DW on my mind most of the time I can't think straight.  This will help my meal planning.

MN Chickadee

I would give her whatever she will eat especially if it is something remotely balanced like soup or frozen meals. She can't change her mind like before and you probably don't have time to be spending oodles of time on meal prep. A frozen meal numerous times a week isn't the end of the world, especially for someone with a serious and terminal illness. 

As for cooking, I figured out some good systems when I was a new mom that may be relevant to a dementia caregiver. Decide how many homemade meals you want to serve in any given week, whether that's one or four or whatever and do the frozen meals in between. Boneless skinless chicken breast is especially easy to cook in large batches and use in different ways. You could make a big batch in a dutch oven, crockpot, instant pot or whatever you like. Simmer in a small amount of water with a little salt for tenderness and flavor until its nice and tender. Then it can be cubed or shredded. Then you could fix the cooked chicken however you want to eat it and put it into soup for her. You could personally have tacos, a chicken and rise casserole mix, stew, put it on a bun with BBQ sauce, put it with veggies and a store bought stir fry sauce on rice, wrap it in a pita. You could do the same with other meat just for yourself such as ground beef or a roast beef, pork shoulder so you can change up your own diet without having to do a bunch of cooking for one.  Already peeled baby carrots, pre-chopped onions and other convenience foods in the produce section may help save time on food prep. There is a product called Better than Bouillon that makes excellent broth, it's a concentrate you mix one teaspoon per cup of hot water. You could use half as much if it's too flavorful. A jar will keep months in the fridge.  Soup freezes well, you could make chicken noodle or chicken and rice and freeze it in 2 cup portions so you only have to make it once a month. Salt is easy to omit and add to your own portion if you want it. You could also buy pre-made soup for her, whether canned, frozen, from a deli etc. and water it down a bit so it isn't as salty. Depending on how sensitive she is you could even remove some of the broth and replace it with plain water. Will she eat a hearty more calorie dense soup such as cream soup? If so there would be many that would give her some fat, such as cheesy broccoli, creamy chicken wild rice, creamy potato etc. How is she with a straw? What about a daily smoothie? You could add some whole fat yogurt, protein powder, and frozen berries, bananas and other things to get her some fresh stuff. Also apple sauce and many products of pureed fruits exist, you can buy any fruit or combination in pouch format for an easy single serving.  There must be something about chewing that her mind or body just doesn't like right now so you'll have to just feed her what she will tolerate. I wouldn't worry too much about variety or feeding her the same thing often, it's apparently what she wants and you get to a point in dementia where eating becomes just give them the pleasure of it. 

I too have no gallbladder and once in a while the acid is intense and painful and causes me to cough. Mine seems to coincide with certain acidic foods such as tomato sauce, lemon juice, white wine etc. and usually happens later in the day/night. It sounds like hers may just be all the time? Have you consulted a pharmacist? There may be an OTC one you could just crush and put in a spoonful of pudding each afternoon or whenever she tends to need it. 

Edited to add: I have heard soups become one of the more challenging foods for a PWD later when swallowing issues begin because of the mixed texture of soup, where as if it was just broth or just solids they can handle it better. So if you find later on that she is having trouble with it you may want to seek the help of a speech therapist to work on a new diet. Her tastes and preferences may have changed by then anyway. 

jfkoc

What we did.....we sprinkled/added protein powder to everything including orange sherbet.

ImMaggieMae

Up until recently my husband was having problems with swallowing and meals were a real problem. (Curiously, cookies and sweets always went down easily.) He still has some difficulty, but is now open to most food as long as it’s cut up well. Ground turkey is a great basis for lots of dishes. I made up a recipe earlier this week in a Dutch oven, with a couple pounds of ground turkey, a can of pineapple chunks in their own juice, chopped onions, garlic, chopped bell peppers, a couple spoonfuls of hot chili paste, soy sauce to taste, a sprinkle of sesame oil, and  ginger. I added a small amount of water and uncooked rice toward the end and simmered. I rarely measure ingredients, just add to taste. I sometimes add frozen peas. This made enough for several meals and could be frozen. You could eliminate the soy sauce. The pineapple gives it sweetness. Canned mandarin oranges also work. The juice sweetens the dish and the rice soaks up the excess liquid.

If she likes chicken soup you could up the calories and protein by whisking a couple of raw eggs in a bowl and pouring them slowly into the simmering soup while stirring with a fork or whisk. Egg drop soup.

I use frozen meals often for lunch or even dinner because they’re quick and gives him a choice when he’s being picky. It’s hard to find frozen dinners that aren’t at least somewhat salty Here are a few that are his favorites, all microwaveable:

Healthy Choice unwrapped burrito bowl

Boston Market Chicken pot pie (more substantial than most frozen pot pies and they smell wonderful when being heated in the microwave.

Stouffers Spinach Soufflé (the package says 3 servings but he’ll eat the whole thing 430 calories and 16grams protein)

Safeway Signature Pad Thai noodle bowl

jmlarue

Don't hesitate to give her what she eats the best. If that's frozen pot pies every night, so be it. If you tend to rely on frozen, prepared meals, it gives you the opportunity to fix yourself something different for yourself without extra effort. I can tell you that my own eating habits have changed substantially in recent years and I don't have dementia. My sense of smell and taste isn't as acute. I don't get the pleasure from eating I once did. I wear dentures, too, and because if that, I'm not a fan of meat anymore. I find it all hard to chew unless it's diced finely and added to a casserole (or a chicken pot pie?) I stopped being a member of the "clean plate" club, so the portion size of my meals has shrunk. Over time, eating less caused my stomach to shrink so I feel full on less food. I tend to only eat 2 real meals a day, breakfast and dinner, but snack more on finger foods (half a banana, a fruit cup or pudding cup, crackers & cheese and, yes, cookies). I do tend to crave sweets more, which I attribute to the diabetes. Craving sweets generally means my blood sugar is going low. Eating less and more frequently works for me. Might work for your wife, too. So long as she's not losing weight and her blood sugars are stable, she's probably fine with the nutrition she's getting and you're doing a good job as chief cook and bottle washer.

Belldream

My thoughts are as long as she's maintaining weight, glucose is good, and all else seems okay with her physically, then let her eat what she wants. We are vegan here, so I know DH gets plenty of veggies. He has his obsessions which I don't say anything about since I want him happy. Currently he's addicted to reduced salt wheat thins! He's also super sensitive to food being to hard, or too salty. So I understand that for sure. A few yearz ago, he was addicted to Ben & Jerry's nondairy ice cream ... he would eat a pint every evening (when he was still able to drive himself to the store while i slept). I noticed his feet started looking like balloon animals they were so swollen. So I redirected him to other things and his feet returned to normal within days. So watch for things like that.

Cherjer

Since my dh eats with his fingers, I stumbled across a site that had finger food ideas from sweets, to protein, to veggies and fruit. Dh can feed himself and eats what he wants. It gives him a sense of independence. You really don't need a site to figure this out. I agree with all that whatever your dh or dh want to eat...let them have what they want.

Davegrant

Thanks to each of you for your replies.  I have a lot of good ideas and some relief about meal preparation. I have to get rid of a lot of "shoulds" to solve this problem.

Rescue mom

More of a musing from me, maybe a tidbit that may help or support someone…:

I used to love to cook, I was pretty good at it, and we were both adventurous eaters and loved trying new things, especially other cultures/countries. (DH had a very funny but also kind of  insulting joke about the “home cooking” food we grew up with).

That all went down the tubes as his Alzheimer’s progressed. Now he doesn’t  know or care much what he ate (except the new craving for sweets), and I slacked off scratch cooking, also b/c my time was needed elsewhere.

I honestly think the important  thing now is just that they eat *something*, frozen, delivered whatever, as long as it doesn’t cause a short-term problem (digestive upset, allergy, diabetes pain).

Serving amounts really puzzled me though. He eats less, but at least he doesn’t remember what he ate so leftovers are not a problem—except to me. I used to make sure I “danced” a lot with any leftovers, made them into something different. I’d be mortified to serve the same thing twice in a row. Now, he doesn’t care, and I’m too tired. But still….but he really doesn’t remember what he ate, so leftovers should be OK. (Convince myself)

We still waste appalling amounts that just usually go bad first. (Aspirations kill me). And DH is unable to find or get  food in the fridge like he used to. But at least my parents never made me clean my plate or force/guilt feed….

MaryG123

I keep these egg muffins in the fridge too, as a high protein finger food.  You can add other ingredients like kale, spinach, mushrooms, or leftover veggies.  I skip the sausage but I’m sure it’s tasty.  https://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/scrambled-egg-muffins/