Any Ideas?

FloydSnax

You wonderful people really saved my life a little while back. I'm at a totally different place because of the advice I got here. There really aren't words to describe my gratitude. My mom was manic and crying all the time and paranoid about the children being taken...I was at my end until I was told to re-direct, and I haven't been at that terrible place in months!! 

This might not be as severe, but I know I'm going about it wrong(again). Maybe because it's getting darker earlier, but the sun is still blaring at 4ish (seems to start at the same time) when she tells me she wants to go to bed already. My response again is the logic route when I know there is no logic to this sickness. I say, "Mom, it's only four o'clock. We haven't even had dinner yet. If you go to sleep now, you'll be wide awake at 1 in the morning and restless in the morning...," Maybe I'm just tired but I can't come up with an quick and easy response? I just thought of, "You can't sleep now. We have guests coming over tonight". Or in a while? I can keep doing the logical because it does stop her briefly...She's eating less...doesn't want to bathe everyday...My new struggles. Any ideas? Anyone?

sandwichone123

I know some time ago someone suggested covering the windows, especially on the west, and putting brighter lighting in the house so it doesn't start looking like evening yet. When she starts wanting to go to bed, always agree, "ok, as soon as we..." then suggest something to take up some time--have ice cream, make a craft, watch this show, whatever you think will distract her until she forgets what she was wanting.

GothicGremlin

I didn't think about covering the windows, but we did put in brighter lights. We put them on timers too so that they'd come on even if we got distracted and forgot (which we often did). The lights really do help.

sunnydove

Do you think she's genuinely tired? Would a nap after lunch help get her to stay up a bit later? 

If it's light related, I got bright white curtains that I pull over the windows just before it gets dark. In addition, I have festive, cheery twinkle lights (basically christmas lights) inside to make it feel like a brighter, happier space she wants to be in. 

You can also promise a reward. My mom LOVES ice cream. You could say if she goes to bed early she will miss having her favorite treat. The ice cream I serve is no-sugar added and only a very small serving but it's enough to motivate her to do almost anything! 

FloydSnax

Sandy

Good advice and I remember reading something about that. And the "As soon as we..." sounds like gold. Can already think of a few things to substitute in. Thank you.

FloydSnax

Goth

I will take your word for it. Nothing like hearing from someone who's gone thru it. Thank you.

FloydSnax

SunnyD

Since I took over this thing, she's getting some quality sleep. Before she would average like 3 or 4 hours a night. Now she's getting solid 9's and 10's. At 90 years old I'm sure she's still tired. And thanks for the "Reward" angle. Thats golden too. I have just the thing. She loves when I comb her hair and put it up in a ponytail. I can do that every night! And I'm getting better at it! Thanks. All this great advice sounds so basic but when I'm going through it...I lose focus.