Wild stories

Love Matters

My Mom is in MC, been there three weeks. She had been telling me that a man had been picking her up at night and they go to her sister's house and some other stuff that sounds all jumbled up. She says she's in trouble. I don't really know how to respond to these stories(there has been others). Today I said, maybe it was a dream. That didn't go over well. So I just said that she probably wasn't in trouble and everything would be ok. Anybody else experienced wild stories from LO and how to respond?

wyoming daughter

Hi Love Matters.  Yes, my Mom makes up stories all the time.  I read it is because with progressive memory loss, the brain fills in the holes with fabrications.  She comes up with some doozies.  I just listen, don't react much, and find something else to talk about, or distract her with.  Hugs.

David J

To the PWD, delusions are absolutely real. I tried a few times to reason with my wife about how preposterous her tales were, but that only convinced her upset and more adamant they were real. Going along with it is the best way to deal with it if you can. My wife’s delusions included me, luckily in a positive way, but it was difficult to play along. All I can tell you is that they eventually stop as the dementia continues to worsen. 

Hang in there. Dave

GothicGremlin

This all sounds familiar. My sister comes up with all kinds of stories about the goings on in memory care.  I know they aren't true because I'm there all the time and I can see how things are.  I just go along with her, which works well.

Stuck in the middle

I just go with the flow, unless the stories are of things that make the teller afraid or sad.  My mother thought a NH employee who resembled my absentee brother was him, but he didn't visit her because there was a rule against hiring relatives of patients.  I could have argued with her and told her he didn't call, write, or visit because she couldn't send him money any more, but I didn't.

My mother was actually aware that it was becoming harder for her to distinguish her dreams from her waking experiences.  If she asked for a reality check, I would give her one.  But only if she asked.

CanyonGal

Perspective - My mom said there were men chasing women and waking uninvited into her room. I thought perhaps some of the male residents were stepping out of line, so I made a phone call. 

Turns out they hired a few male assistants who helped out in Memory Care, but not with bathroom duties or anything like that. I have seen them deliver food to a room or help assist someone down the hall, but her mind was making it something sinister. 

Stories do get bizarre - She is only living there because she was hired to do a job, she gets to eat free at the restaurant, there are robbers in the building (laundry detail bring or removing clothing)