Losing Mom...my first time here - Hospice time?

Leigh50

Good evening,

This is my first time posting.  I have tried to find a local in person support group but there are not any in my county.  My mom has had dementia/alz for 1 1/2 years.  It feels like it went so fast and I have no more time with her.  I am an only child which is great in making the decisions but bad because my relationship was extra special since she was my only parent.  Its amazing how many memories have been popping up and how I know once she passes, she is my last connection to that part of my life.  I find myself missing the things we shared and  how now she barely wakes up and it is excruciating how she can no longer do the things she loved like reading and crosswords.  She is not swallowing easily and is a skeleton, she will not even eat the sherbert or ice cream she so loved.  She lived with my family for the past 18 years before I had to put her in a nursing home, which of course does not take care of her the way I would.  I always have taken care of her, and am at a loss that I cannot fix everything.  Feeling helpless.  I just wanted to post not to complain but to share some of my feelings since I  know many of you are experiencing similar situations.  I am considering moving her from the nursing home to the Hospice home.  Can anyone share if this is the right thing to do   I do not want to disrupt what she is used to and cause her to be uncomfortable or scared. 

M1

Welcome Leigh.  Losing a parent is never easy, and especially so when you've had such a unique connection.  It sounds like she's pretty close to her end days.  I would think carefully about what you would hope to accomplish by moving her?  Is there some aspect of care that you think would be better at the Hospice facility than where she is now?  Is she awake enough to know?  Is there a compelling cost factor that's driving you to consider making a change?  Those are the questions I would want to factor into the decision.  I hope that you can focus on comfort and peaceful time no matter where she is....

loveskitties

Have you checked with your available hospice locations to see if they can provide services in her current facility?

This would probably be a better option than a move.

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mommyandme (m&m)

If hospice isn’t already coming into the facility for her, I’d definitely get them in for an evaluation.  They will let you know if moving her is feasible or if they may provide comfort for her where she is now.  

Thanks for sharing and Im very sorry for your heartbreak.