Dad has aspiration pneumonia, not treating, stopped sustenance 3 days ago

cheryllyne

For someone I didn't always like when he was well, I'm surprised how hard this is. My dad last ate some thickened liquids Monday, kept choking, today is Friday. He's got aspiration pneumonia, is on oxygen and coughing up gunk that I wipe away and my stomach is turning but I don't want to wuss out and leave him alone. So trash can is near.

It is SO HARD to see him suffer like this! I've asked for more morphine as I can see he's in pain. They're reluctant to give more since his blood pressure is low and morphine will likely lower it more. 

Hospice is coming shortly, wish me luck in getting more morphine to make him more comfortable. 

CatsWithHandsAreTrouble

I'm sure that this was a hard decision, my heart goes out to you. I hope the hospice will work with you in keeping your dad comfortable.

At this point, what harm would low blood pressure be for him?

cheryllyne

I agree! I got them to double it so hopefully he'll be more comfortable soon.

dayn2nite2

I'm glad hospice is helping with the morphine.  As long as he's comfortable, that's all that matters.  This part is not pleasant - but I used that time with my mom to just talk and talk to her (she was in a coma) and I said everything I wanted to say to her and it was okay when she finally let go.

cheryllyne

It's really nice that you had so much to share with her, it sounds like it was a good way for you to say goodbye. 

I really haven't had much to say to him except telling him I love him every so often. However now I think I'll try harder to share with him what he's meant to me, going to lose the chance soon. Thank you for sharing, your comment made me think past just getting through this and to using the time together. 

cheryllyne

My dad passed away peacefully this morning. I'm so glad he went so quickly after losing the ability to swallow.

CatsWithHandsAreTrouble

Your father, while you had your differences, was so fortunate that you were there to help him have a peaceful passing. You did well. Loss is always difficult; remember to be kind to yourself as you come into this new season of change. ((Hugs))

M1

Condolences Cheryl.  Glad he didn't linger.

ninalu

cheryllyne,
Sending you warm wishes of peace and comfort. Your dad was fortunate to have your care, attention, and steadfastness.  

Thank you also for sharing your journey. It helps me process my own. 

harshedbuzz

cheryllyne-

I am sorry for your loss. Please be gentle with yourself going forward.

HB

mommyandme (m&m)

So sorry for this difficult time. Even though there may be a level of relief, there’s still grief.  I hope you take care of you now and allow yourself time.  I’m glad his passing was peaceful.  Thank you for sharing!

May flowers

Sorry for your loss

dayn2nite2

I'm sorry for your loss, but I am glad he was comfortable during that last bit.

Joydean

Sorry for your loss but glad you were able to get the morphine to ease his pain. Prayers for you and your family.