8 Months later

LongBee2021

I joined this forum sometime in 2021. It was a wonderful resource for advice and comfort during a very trying time. My dad died in February. I miss him so much. 

A Facebook memory popped up for me today and I was reminded what a difference a year can make. On October 7, 2021, I was alone in my room crying and self soothing, wondering how we were going to make it through 2022. 2021 had been so difficult and I was imagining that 2022 was only going to get worse. Ovtober 7, 2022 I spent the night out with a friend, relatively carefree. I miss him everyday and while I wish he were still here with me, I am happy he is no longer in any pain. I am equally as happy that my own quality of life has improved dramatically. 

I just wanted to offer some encouragement. Yes, what you are going through is difficult and you will be changed forever, but it will end. Happiness will come to you again. You ans your loved one will know peace again. 

In case I don't post again this year, I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season and a very happy new year. Thank you all who offered advice and support last year. It was a remarkable gift. 

sandwichone123

LongBee, thank you for the update. Sometimes it's hard to imagine the sunshine beyond the clouds.

mommyandme (m&m)

Thank you very much for your encouragement, just what I needed today.  I hope for your continued happiness and renewal.

wyoming daughter

thank you for your encouragement, we sometimes need to hear from someone who has already been down the road we are headed.  Today is a rough day.

May flowers

Like others, I so appreciate this post. I’m having a hard time seeing the light at the end of the tunnel lately

Sunshine days

I would just like to add a complimentary post to LongBee2021's , which was wonderful and positive and inspiring. 

 Now, 15 months out from my sweet mama's passing, I can look back and see the silver linings to so many of the clouds that constantly swirled overhead during my long voyage of caregiving for her. My encouragement for all of you still walking that very difficult and often  overwhelming road, is to look for and try to appreciate the silver linings. 

They are there but you have to look for them. Those perhaps unexpected moments of clarity or humor or love and connection passing between you and your loved one in the midst of the struggles.

They will comfort you on your most difficult days and in your grief when your person is gone. 

May God bless you all. 

Deanna_M

Thanks for posting this, LongBee, and chiming in, Sunshine days. My dear mom passed away in May and I have often thought about coming back onto the forum to encourage everyone who is the midst of the chaos, heartbreak, and sadness. It does end. 

I am surprised now by how profoundly my life was shaped by the last 5 years with my mother. My mom and I grew in unimaginable ways, but I did not see it until she passed away and I had time and mental space to realize it. I now am living such a full life: I have more time and energy for my family; I can travel without thinking "what if something happens while I am away." I am confident that my mother would have wanted me to reclaim my hobbies, my family, and my life and I am doing it! It feels good. I still get overwhelmed with sadness sometimes and will cry at very strange times. But she is at peace and so am I.

I am deeply grateful for all of you on this board. Take good care.