Question for those who sold their home and downsized.

toolbeltexpert

I have listed my home for sale and I am looking for a place closer to where my dw is placed. I was wondering if you have done this, is there anything you would do differently?

The next question is for those who have or might be thinking of placing your lo. I found a piece of prime property within a 1/4 of my wife's facility. It is several acres with awesome views and the price reflects that,it has a residential rating according to the listing.

I was thinking about how convenient that is, I also wondered what if I could do a tiny home subdivision and gear it towards folks who want to be close to their lo at the facility. What do you all think? What if there were small communities like this built near where you placed your lived one? Would it be attractive? It would be much cheaper than going with a full blown house.

I was thinking of  600sq ft houses geared toward elderly, you know ramps handicap bathrooms,ect but modest. I really think this property would be ideal for this. I am just shooting the idea out there to see if there would be a market geared toward this. There certainly isn't going to be a shortage of folks heading towards that mcf with the silver tsunami. 

Stewart

MaryG123

What a great idea Stewart!  My DH and I downsized from a farm to a 1000 sq. ft. cottage, and it’s working out great for us.  I have a small yard for gardening, and he has a tool shed for puttering.   I wouldn’t do anything differently.  Be sure to check zoning to make sure there’s no minimum square footage requirement.  That’s been an issue in our neck of the woods.

CD5

I think this is a fabulous idea and I’ve had a similar idea to this myself.  I can’t believe someone hasn’t done this yet!  Go for it!

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ImMaggieMae

I think it’s a great idea, Stewart. You’d have to check zoning requirements and all of that, of course. Something around 900 sq. Ft. Might be more realistic when you consider ramps and maybe doorways and kitchens with adequate space for a wheelchair since your gearing it to folks who might need that now or in the future.

harshedbuzz

TBE-

It sounds as if you are re-inventing the Independent Living area of a Continuing Care Community. While most of these are pay-as-you-go, some have a hefty entrance fee that is returned to you, or your heirs, should you not spend down all of t with higher acuity care. FWIW, this model is not "cheaper". 

Cost of Senior Living at Ann's Choice in Bucks County, Pennsylvania (ericksonseniorliving.com)

One of the men in my local IRL support group lived in a different CCRC and it worked really well for them. They've moved in years before his DW developed dementia and had built quite a social network, so he never became as isolated as some caregivers do. When his wife moved into their SNF he was able to walk across the campus to have meals with her or bring her to the gym to swim or to lunch in the main dining area.

To your other question, I would avoid making a move unless you have to. I think it's generally best, especially when a couple who has a real home they've lived in and loved on, for the caregiving spouse to figure out where they want to be in Stage 8 which might not be possible until they find themselves there. I can appreciate that Medicaid has a limit on the value of a house owned by the community spouse and that in some rural areas a MCF could potentially be several hours away, but absent something like that it makes sense to consider a move carefully.

That said, I did move my parents when dad was finally diagnosed. They split the year 200 miles and 1200 miles away from where I live. It had become unsafe for my mom as dad could not act as her healthcare advocate which almost killed her. Moving wasn't ideal but I had no guilt about extracting them from either house. They bought houses more often than I replace my cars- in the 10 years before dad died, they'd lived at 6 different addresses. 

I moved my parents from a 55+ apartment complex that meets all your criteria in the days after dad was diagnosed. It was very nice, but it felt tight to them (900 sqft), and mom missed having a garage and garden in which to putter. I found her a small (1500 sqft) twin house- it's a 55+ community with everything but golf. Lawn care and most exterior maintenance are included in the hefty HOA fee. It's a pretty good space for a person with mobility issues-- the entry has no real step up, the primary bedroom and bath (large zero entry shower) are on the first floor. The police and EMTs are just down the street and there's a large shopping center with grocery, pharmacy, banks, hair salon, card & gift shop, a bagel shop, excellent steakhouse and some very nice clothing stores exactly 1/4 mile from her home. A slightly longer walk would take her to a bus stop which could potentially be the first leg of a trip anywhere in the world. I chose this neighborhood for its walkability as I knew my mom was already having vision loss. It's mostly been a good choice, but it hasn't been 100% perfect. She's 85 (Silent Generation) and kind of invisible to many of the younger (First wave of the Boomers) residents and is routinely ignored. When I go with her to the pool, the locals all chat my 60-something-self up while ignoring their neighbor. 

Good luck whatever you choose to do.

HB

Marie58

I think the most important thing to consider at this point is, where do you want to live if DW passes before you? 

We downsized a year after DH's diagnosis. It was closer to my work and our kids/grandkids. It was also close to the MC I figured we'd place DH in if and when the time came, which it did. He's been there 2 years now. It's great that I'm so close to his MC, but I don't think that should be the main reason for a move. I picked a house that I can see living in for the rest of my life. 

Jo C.

You will want to seek advice from a CELA about how to manage the profit from the sale of your house.  The facility your wife is presently in, is private pay only.  I do not now how long it will take to sell your property; if it takes many months, can you sustain the private pay fees?  Do you have an agent who will take a percentage of the sale price as well as costs for any remediation done under their auspices, or are you selling on your own?

If your wife has a long span of life despite having dementia, (my step-dads course of dementia was about 20 years), will your sale proceeds continue to support the costs of her facility, (she is very high functioning at this point), as well as your own living expenses - especially  should you develop an illness and/or need custodial care for yourself?   The costs of  Medicare Supplemental Policies are rising to gob smacking levels and a Supplemental Police covers only one person; therefore, if married, one needs two Supplemental Polices unless one is in an Advantage Program if one is near enough one to join such a plan. Those considerations are all part of the expenses.

Is it possible that in the future you will need Medicaid as a payor for the cost of facility care for your wife and/or yourself?  These  are all questions to get professional advice with.  I wonder if you have projected the length of time that proceeds from the sale would last for one person in care, or two people in care or one at home after the purchase price of the new property and one in care.

I agree that buying a place you will want to stay in for the rest of your independent days is of significant importance.

As for building tiny residences near the care facility - if you were thinking of investing your own money, it is even more important to get professional advice and see the CELA asap.  If you do such a thing, it may have ramifications for future needs if things do not work out as well as you hoped they would and assistance with costs is needed.  Medicaid can be mighty stringent in its criteria.

As for creating the tiny houses; well, there would be costs for the residents.  Would those houses be for sale or for rent/lease?  Either way, if someone is paying steep costs for the NH care, would they be able to sustain the added costs of the tiny homes permanently affecting their assets? Think CCRC models of care which is so pricey; but those who reside there get more for the bucks as far as in-home support such as cleaning, activities and meals.

So much to think about.  The tiny houses really do seem like an Independent Living setting without the meals or the cleaning people or any other assistance or oversight.  And; if one's LO is in the NH, it is more than likely that the well spouse would also be older and have their own healthcare needs to be accommodated; how close are hospitals and doctors offices and other healthcare settings for seniors to that property?

Always good to be thinking and even dreaming; and of course getting the facts and figures down right is the priority for knowing how to manage one's possible future at this stage of life.

Best, best of wishes and hoping your proprerty sale goes well and soon,

J.

Stuck in the middle

Marie58 wrote:

I think the most important thing to consiander at this point is, where do you want to live if DW passes before you? 

We downsized a year after DH's diagnosis. It was closer to my work and our kids/grandkids. It was also close to the MC I figured we'd place DH in if and when the time came, which it did. He's been there 2 years now. It's great that I'm so close to his MC, but I don't think that should be the main reason for a move. I picked a house that I can see living in for the rest of my life. 

Ditto.  Another thing to consider is, would you like the place if you couldn't drive?

My FIL developed two subdivisions.  The developer was required to pay for streets, utilities, etc.  It cost a lot of money.  

I think a small house is a great idea.  Our first house was an 850 sq. ft. 2 BR 1930s bungalow, and it was just right for a couple with a small child.  The house we have now is three times that big, and we use about a third of it.

Ed1937

Smaller house? Yes! Building a new community? Costly. Do you think 600 sq. ft. houses are big enough? You would have to have a sewage system for each of the houses. And there would be tons of costs that you haven't even thought of. My suggestion would be to do your homework until you're sure of getting an "A". Then weigh the pros and the cons. Good idea, but may or may not workable.

toolbeltexpert

Thanks everyone, most of what you all mentioned about checking the regs, ect had hit my mind, as well as what Victoria mentioned. I thought the big guys would maybe be enticed but why would they want to affect the AL parts of their biz?? I had thought of contacting the owner and still might?

I guess this might be just a pipe dream, but better than no dreams of what could be. When I started working for a non profit food ministry, the first year was like 4 million pounds of food we distributed, when I left 6 years later it was over 10 million and they are much higher now and better funded now. 

The size I thought of was more like the houses folks lived in when I was a kid. 800 or a 1000 might be better. Again it's just a dream. I drove by the property today and it gets sun all day, south facing.  I could tell someone has driven thru it recently. The price had dropped by 80k so that is what made it look so attractive to me. Still over 100k for 3.64 acres which is high for this area. I would still love to have my little place on it if it wasn't to expensive. I can still build pretty much anything I put my mind to, it just might take a little longer.

I still think it would be a good biz model. But for me I saw it as a ministry it would be good for caregivers to have this type of option, IMHO.

I appreciate all the encouragement you supplied. I pray the Lords will for everything, because He has  plan and I don't. I continue to pray about it. And to those you believe I would ask you to pray about this.

I had to edit this because I really felt inspired about this, I have helped build homes, churches,hospitals, I was just a very small cog in the works, others gave to build it, I was just a laborer I carried block and mixed mortar and concrete, I think of all the orphanages and hospitals built in this country because  someone saw a need and God's inspired people to work and give and only God can do those things and I know it. So whether anything happens or not, I pray God's will be done. I know personally know a couple that both had high paying medical positions, they left their 3 million dollar home and went to Mexico and now the orphanage they started is building a large orphanage on property that the ministry owns. It has taken many years but it is being done. LA Ola is its name. This has taken 15 years or more.

mommyandme (m&m)

My friend’s parents moved to Mexico for a facility for their dad.  His care was much cheaper there and they took very good care of him.  Their mom lived off campus in just the kind of place you’re talking about.  It was a win/win for both of them.  I think it sounds wonderful.  If the healthy LO doesn’t need assistance maybe it could be a cheaper option than living in a large community (facility) setting.

toolbeltexpert

I didn't mention this. but there is another man who visits his dw most mornings where my dw is, we both get there about the same time. He had downsized his house and moved from another state, his dw is from this area and has family that is local, it was the realization that this is so common, and the options of getting something small isnt as easy as it sounds and rent is becoming more expensive as gentrification seems to be happening out in the country,as more people move in looking for a little land, like most places things have soared. I have priced my place along those lines,most folks around here couldn't afford it.

Thanks m&m lots of Americans are choosing South of the border as a viable alternative.  I spent some time in Guatemala and the cost of living 10 years ago was crazy cheap. There is a huge poverty gap there as well. That time of my life changed my perspective on what we really need to live. I got rid of a lot of unnecessary things,I must say I like warm showers and clean water though. My current house is way too much now.

I really appreciate all the varied points. 

Stewart

Joe C.

TBE, I have been trying to find a house near DW’s MC for 11 months now. Unfortunately in my area when a single floor home in move in ready conditions goes on the market there is a bidding war for it. Most homes in my area are two story capes or colonials and there are so many seniors looking to downsize there are always multiple offers. I wish you luck in your search.

toolbeltexpert

Thanks Joe c I find a place and when I go to just see the area there are folks already with the realtor, I am not gonna do the bidding war thing.