One Year in MC

Joe C.

It seems hard to believe but it was a year ago today that I placed DW in MC. We have been fortunate, DW is engaged & happy there and has never once asked about home. I visit her 4 to 5 times a week, take her to lunch a couple of times per month and bring the dog for visits. DW loves having a lot of people around and can always be found dancing & singing when there is music events. This afternoon there is a singer/musician coming in so I will go and dance with her. As for myself, I still miss her everyday .

M1

Joe, your experiences have been very important to me to hear about and to learn from, and I always, always appreciate your posts on this forum.  I am glad she is settled and that you have found a routine--for now--and that it is working for both of you.  And yet I totally get how the anniversary tugs at your heart, and the memories are both sweet and painful.  I long for what you're describing, being able to visit a lot, to take the dog, to go out to lunch.  Maybe we'll get there--but somehow I don't think so, that's just not my partner's personality.  But I am very, very glad you have it.  May the second year you're facing be a stable one.

Ed1937

Joe, you're right. It doesn't seem like a whole year already. I've noticed how time flies when I read posts from others too. 

I'm glad things are working out for both of you, but I'm sure you miss her.

JoseyWales

Wow, a year. Time goes so fast. I'm so glad she's found things there to enjoy. 

ghphotog

I'm glad your MC experience is a positive. That gives me hope. I would be doing the very same thing, visiting all the time, going to lunch, bringing the dogs. She loves our dogs and that would bring her a lot of joy.
My DW seems to thrive in ALZ specialty daycare. State certified in Alzheimer's care. She seems to be all smiles when I pick her up after a few hours but always seems reluctant to go back.
I'm hoping that M-F daycare would be enough for me, for respite, before full time MC.
I dread that day but by then she may not know anything about what is happening or forget in an hour.
Your experience is refreshing to hear and helps me re-evaluate how helpful that could be for her. I'm thinking I give her the best care but she really does need so much more mental stimulation than I can provide by myself. Your story takes out a little bit of the doom and gloom of MC.

Jeff86

Joe — it scarcely seems possible that it’s a whole year, but there it is.  You are so fortunate that she has made such a good transition, and seems to be doing so well at her MCF.  As for you—yes, the heartache never goes away.  I am so sorry it’s so hard for you…and for all of us caregivers.

Beachfan

 Hi Joe,

Joining you in an anniversary that is not happy, but an anniversary nonetheless. We are kindred spirits where placement day is involved. I am happy each time I read that your DW has transitioned well and continues to thrive at her MCF. At one year in, DH has settled in, but his situation is somewhat different. He is simply no longer “here”,  but “there”; oblivious to his surroundings, to me, to friends and family. I am heading out shortly for a visit. One of DH’s longtime friends from high school is going along; She has been a good friend to me during the 50+ years since I married DH and I became the “new girl in town”. I will be interested to see her reaction and hear her thoughts on his progression and his present  state. Best wishes to you and your DH.