Opinions Please(1)

ElCy

The hospital said that in the next few days they will recommend DH return to memory care or geripsych. He was at a geripsych hospital for 4 weeks 2 months ago. That facility does not allow visitors. Do you think it would be best for him to return there since they know him and will be able to see first hand how far he has declined or should I try for a unit that will allow him to see me.  He still know me, loves me, wants me to be around. I’ve been with him at the hospital every day for about 14 hours

Ed1937

ElCy, that's an awful lot of time to spend at the hospital. That must be wearing you down. Wherever you decide to put him, you might want to consider shortening the hours you are putting in there. You have to take care of yourself.

That must be a hard decision to make when considering the pros and cons. I don't think you can make a wrong choice. If you were satisfied with how they handled things the last time, that could be taken into consideration too. I wish the best for both of you.

ImMaggieMae

You asked for opinions. Mine is that I would never put my loved one in a facility that didn’t allow visitors. Just reading here about all of the understaffed facilities and ones with very substandard care such as dirty sheets, patients lying in dirty or urine soaked clothing, meds being missed or patients being neglected and falling would make me want to check every day to make sure care is adequate.

ElCy

He did great there the first time they really helped him. But, that being said, he was continent at the time and had most of his ADLs.

piozam13

My opinion - when our doctor said - he's not going home, because I'm taking and checking him into the hospital.  My response was - you're not taking him anywhere unless I go with him.  I would have been miserable.  I felt that he wanted me around and now I have good memories of our time together those last two weeks.

toolbeltexpert

Elcy I get it. Such a hard choice. You know what's right for you. I don't know how you do 14hrs but we know your so dedicated. Are you in any danger of losing his place at the memory care? Are they open to him coming back as is?

Praying for you always

harshedbuzz

ElCy-

I don't feel like you can make a case for a hospital admission without a medical need. 

HB