At what stage did you give up on dental hygiene appointments

tigersmom

Yesterday I took my DH to the dentist for a hygiene appointment. For the two days prior to the appointment, he cycled repeatedly through all the terrible things that were going to happen -- they were going to remove half his jaw, they were going to take out all his gold inlays, etc. Constant reassurance that they were simply going to clean his teeth did not help much. At the appointment, I was not surprised when I was called in by the dental technician ten minutes into the appointment, since this happened the last time four months ago. Last time, I was able to talk him down and he let her finish. This time I had to remain in the room for the rest of the appointment, watching him squirm and flinch. At one point, he was close to tears. I get it: it hurts. I don't like it either, but I can understand why it's necessary. He cannot. So my question is, at one point did you simply give up on this for your LO? I estimate that he is in early- to mid-stage 5. I have kept taking him because his own brushing and flossing is no longer so hot, but I can't stand to see him suffer through this.

Beachfan

I stopped taking DH for dental appts. several years ago. His teeth were in good shape (no cavities or dental work for years); I was physically and totally brushing his teeth at the time.  He was unable to process the hygienist’s directions and the checkups were an exercise in futility.  I gave him apple slices every day to help “clean” his teeth.  Fast forward- - he is in a MCF since Nov., 2021 and does not receive routine checkups.  Staff brush his teeth as well as he will allow (he can’t figure out how to open his mouth for brushing molars).  His breath is fresh; he does not appear to have any dental issues.  So far, so good. 

He requires total physical assistance for all ADL’s.  He is physically healthy; he takes no medication and only sees the facility doctor once a year.  He is just fading away.  Very sad, but he is comfortable and content.  It’s a tough call; best of luck to you.  

White Crane

I gave up routine dental exams for him about five years ago. He couldn’t cooperate with having his teeth cleaned. I have taken him to the dentist for a broken bridge and for a broken tooth. At the appointment for the broken tooth, he asked the dentist if she were a doctor or a veterinarian. No cooperation!

White Crane

I stop checking my husband for routine dental exams about five years ago. He couldn’t cooperate and the dentist said there was no need for him to come back unless was it was an emergency.

GothicGremlin

I'm with you tigersmom. This is something that I'm starting to really think about - when to stop? 

My sister Peggy has a dentist appointment next Wednesday afternoon and I'm already dreading it. She has no idea she's going, of course. And I don't plan on telling her about it until Wednesday morning.

She's later stage 6, and she still knows she should go to the dentist - and she even wants to go to the dentist.  She has always liked getting her teeth cleaned. As a result, she has perfect teeth and has never had a cavity.

Thing is, she can't follow instructions anymore. Her dentist and the hygienists are so patient with her, but I'm worrying that next Wednesday might be one of the last visits she can manage.

So yeah, when do we decide this is it?

Jgirl57

We have one more dental cleaning after about 3 years of dental

work to get things as good as possible . My HWD had some problems the last visit

cooperating with the hygienist .I figured we would do one more cleaning and call it quits after that . I like Beachfans  idea if the apple slices.My HWD does enjoy thinly sliced apples so I will do that more frequently. He still brushes his own teeth but needs me to remind him to do it.

JulieB46

I just cancelled DH's cleaning appointment.  His last one was 6 months ago, and I had to stay in the room with him and tell him what to do.  Then he stayed in the room while I had mine cleaned so he didn't wander.  In that six months, he stopped brushing his own teeth and showering without help.

Paris20

My husband with Alzheimer’s had a paralyzing stroke nine months ago. When his scheduled dental appointment came up, I canceled it. Transporting him would be exceedingly difficult. I think he would have a hard time staying still. If anything led to his feeling pain, my husband would lash out, verbally and physically.

tigersmom

Thank you to everyone who rang in on this topic. I have started serving up apple slices after lunch at Beachfan's suggestion, because I don't think he's going back for this. GothicGremlin, how did Peggy's visit go last Wednesday? I was very impressed that she still wanted to go to get her teeth cleaned.

GothicGremlin

Hi tigersmom --

Well, it was an adventure. 

Honestly, the toughest part was getting Peggy in and out of the car. Getting her out of the car was quick, I was able to hold onto her hands and kind of lift her out. Getting her into the car took more than twenty minutes, with two of us working to get her situated. She really doesn't know where she is in space anymore.

At the dentist we needed to help her into the chair, but it was a lot easier than the car.

The actual cleaning took awhile, but Peggy is still really good-natured about most things, and her dentist is amazing. When Peggy got frustrated, the dentist got her to sing, and she sang along with Peggy. That calmed her down and they could continue the exam.  I was impressed.

I don't know if I'll get another year of dentists, and the next visit is six months from now, so we'll have to see where things are then. But at least we got her through this one!