(For you) Alzheimer’s is…

Arrowhead

In September of 2020, a post asked us to complete the sentence, “Alzheimer’s is…” At the time, my response was, “knowing that, if I can’t find it, it’s probably in her purse.” What a difference 2 years have made. She no longer has a purse. At the time, I had a 5-foot tall 5-year-old; now I have a 5-foot tall 3-year-old, in diapers even. There’s nothing constructive that she can do on her own anymore. Her communication skills are gone. She’s lost 75 pounds, even though she eats more than I do. When I put my arms around her, it no longer feels like her. She looks so much older than she really is. I decided to see if I could get this started again. Please add your thoughts; funny or sad. 

Alzheimer’s is…missing my wife, even though she’s lying in bed next to me.

LaurenB

Alzheimer’s (today) is: finding out that my mom said that she saw someone drop something so she just picked it up.   (This is apparently their story of how I was born.). This couldn’t be farther from the truth. I’m not adopted and I look just like her. . Who knows what Alzheimer’s will be tomorrow.

Quilting brings calm

Alzheimer’s ( or dementia) is my step-dad being so paranoid about me doing the grocery shopping that he will do it even though he is too physically weak to do it.  Thankfully the AL provides meals so he doesn’t need to buy much.  Alzheimer’s ( or dementia) is my mom making a comment on her own Facebook post that she had shared from my Facebook post. She  commented the same thing on my post twice.

CarolynATL

Alzheimer's is watching a slow train take my father away, while making a mental list of all the things I wish I had asked about his life story before it was too late.

Kay82

For me Alzheimers is a thief. It stole my father in 2019 and now my mother will be joining him for the same reason.  My parents were such upstanding community and church members.  My father is pictured in a news article from the '70s about his factory & another one combining to form 1 credit union He was the board president, a man who never went past the 8th grade. My mother worked in an office making sure all the bills were paid after the new nursing home in town was built in the '80s. She also worked as a school secretary in the '70s.  They were faithful parishioners and volunteered in every capacity at church.

My father was in every way a gentleman.  In the month before he passed away he was sitting in his recliner and spitting on the floor. 

My mother, who was amazing in the kitchen and with my father designed the kitchen in this house as well as the one I grew up in.  She helps by drying the dishes then will say, as she sets the item aside,  'I don't know where this goes'.

My family and I say 'they are gone before they are gone.'

GothicGremlin

I'm so sorry Arrowhead, and everyone here.

For me?  Alzheimer's is always feeling like the solid ground beneath my feet isn't as solid as I think it is. It's slipping and sliding and I'm holding on as best I can.

SusanB-dil

alz is rearranging everything in my life just for 'her', even though she doesn't give a cr*p. As long as she is comfy and content that's all that counts.

Cosmic

Alz in the worst of the worst. I've lost a child at 15, heart, brother at 54, pancreatic cancer, father at 59, lung cancer, sister in law at 62, breast cancer, mother in law at 64, pancreatic cancer, brother in law at 39, melanoma, father in law at 80, Parkinson's. Cancers can be either controlled and in some cases cured. Alz. is a lingering death of 10,000 cuts with no cure.

Joydean

Arrowhead this is a great thread and I wish you would place it on the “spouse and partner “ page too. 

For me Alzheimer is the cruelest disease. It robs victims of all their dignity. It steals the person they were. They have no idea what is happening to them. Someone else has to take care of all their personal needs. As you described your wife, my husband is a 6’4” 200 pound three year old. A Vietnam veteran, a husband, father of three, a very good man who would do anything for others. Now doesn’t even know how to get into bed by himself.  

Mlewis501

Alzheimer's is what took my mom.  I am coming up on the one year anniversary of her death and I miss her.  I miss the person she was before the disease when I could call, visit, and just talk to her.  I even miss the person she was at the end of this horrible disease when I could at least still sit with her even though she had no idea who I was..... Alzheimer's is what took my mom's life long before she passed away.  

mommyandme (m&m)

Alzheimer’s is lonely.  It’s left a crater in my heart and soul.

Whyzit

Alzheimer’s is absolute selfishness requiring caregivers to be absolutely selfless. The trick is in trying to find balance between the two extremes.

JulesRN33

Alzheimer’s is… watching my Dad disappear one inch at a time, and wishing for a Time Machine to go back to when he was well and whole.

LicketyGlitz

Dementia is a war I knew we were gonna lose, but in the end I know I punched it in the face every darn* day (and took my share of blows!), to give my mom the best end of life dementia would allow her. And when she moved on I know she finally got to be proud of us both for showing up to a battle where victory was never an option.

JulesRN33

I feel that deep in my soul.  (((Hugs)))

notjolly

I know what you are going though. My brother is the same way. I always feel guilt for even thinking of myself. He is the one that is taking that long dark road and it's sad, but I'm the one being drug along.  It has always been about him and I guess it will be until the end.

A. Marie

For both me and my DH, Alzheimer's is a life sentence without any clear parole date. A friend of DH came up with this metaphor a while back, and it seems as appropriate as any.

ZackFootInMouth

Inevitable