Well I tired

notjolly

Here again, My brother blew everything when he started going down to the 7/11 and getting wine. Hiding it from me in his room. Wine and cancer meds didn't go well together. He called me up to his room saying he couldn't walk. He threw up in his breakfast plate. I called 911 they took him to the ER. and then he was admitted to the hospital. While there he got C-diff. The board and care that I had planned to put him in would not except him until he tested neg. for C-diff. he was in the hospital for a week and then transferred to a Rehab center where he is now until they can place him in a care facility. The Doctor at the hospital said they wouldn't even test for a neg. of C-diff for at least 2 mos. and that even at that with all the health issue he has he could get C-diff again.

 With all the stress I ended up in the ER and admitted into the hospital with chest pains. Come to find out I have what they call Broken Heart syndrome (Takotsubo cardiomyopathy) all due to stress. So I can't have him come back here for my own health. He wants to come "visit" and check out the room he had and stay for "a couple" of days. I told him that I couldn't care for him like he should be cared for and that I am working with the Rehab center to find him a place not far from me. This isn't going to go well because he thinks he is getting an apartment but it will be a senior board and care and it's going to cost him. That I'm not telling him because he think he should get everything for free. I am on his checking account so will be paying his bills.

This almost killed me or at least it felt like it an now I'm on med. and I have a new doctor of  Cardiology. The saying what doesn't kill you makes you stronger isn't always true. Trying to make Jim happy at all cost is not worth it. 

SusanB-dil

Oh, my! they say if not one thing, it's another. (and sometimes it seems like just when we put out one fire, and there's another) Sorry you had to deal with all of that. You did everything you could, and at the expense of your health...  not a good thing, of course.  I agree that you cannot have him come back.

GwendolynD

Notjolly I am glad you got to the hospital and got your diagnosis.  You have gone above and beyond taking good care of your brother, but now you must take care of yourself. You are absolutely correct to get him placed.  Visit him once you get your health back.  Don't let him back into your home.  

I'm a recent newcomer to this forum.  My Mom was diagnosed with probable Lewy Body dementia last year.  I've moved her in with me, with the intention of taking care of her as long as I can.  Through the end of her life if possible.  I have no idea if I'll be able to pull it off, I guess I need to take it one day at a time.  Thank you so much for sharing your story.

dayn2nite2

You're doing the right thing by not taking him on - it'll kill you.  We say all the time here don't let this disease kill 2 people (them and you) and you need to survive so you can still advocate for him in whatever facility he ends up in.