MC Facilities denied entrance

horseman

I don’t know if this resonates with anyone. But my wife has early onset. She was always taken care of by me at home. Absolutely no medication was needed now she is at the point where she gets scared a lot and a dual personality appears so one night I took her to the ER  Hoping they would give her something to calm down. They held her down and gave her an injection. They asked if I needed help giving her medicine. I said yes they said they would send her to a facility to help dial in the medicine little did, I know they took her away quickly to a psych ward  And she has been locked in a very small room. Round the clock while trying to administer medicine she is extremely scared, and they keep giving her injections to calm her down. When I am allowed to visit she is calm and talks to me but complains about the staff , I am trying to get her into any memory care or nursing facility I can. But they are all rejecting her because the psych ward said she tried to escape, even though she is behind seven levels of lock doors, and she came from being at home where she could walk around  Two locked in a small room. To me it is normal to try to get out of that room and now since they wrote it up on her chart, no one will take her. She is being discharged in seven days and I have nowhere to take her, I don’t believe I can  Continually have her at home. 

I asked, can you give her more medicine to calm her down so she’s not so scared of everything they said they don’t do that. I said being scared hiding behind a bed there’s no way to live the rest of her life I would rather have her drugged and calm.  

MaryG123

I’m so sorry for you and your DW, horseman.  The situation sounds awful.  There are memory care facilities that deal with patients who try to escape, and have locked secure buildings or wings.  They will be more likely to accept her.  Also, the hospital will have a social worker who can help you find a placement.  Tell them now that you cannot and will not take her home, for safety reasons.  And yes, they need to find a solution for her fear and anxiety.  Does she have a psychiatrist?  Have you met with her doctors?  Let us know how things progress.

harshedbuzz

horseman-

I am so sorry you are not getting the help you need to secure an appropriate placement for your DW.

When she was admitted to the psych ward, was it a regular psychiatric ward or was it a specialized geri-psych ward that would be familiar with dementia behaviors and how medication is impacted by dementia. You mention her having EO Alzheimer's which could result in her being turfed to the general psych unit. 

Re-read what Mary said about leaning on the hospital's social worker to find a placement by refusing to take her home for safety reasons. Many MCFs will accept those with exit-seeking behaviors, but some places that cherry-pick residents for the pleasantly befuddled won't. These tend to be corporate chain facilities with beautiful decor which can be very appealing to families who tour. 

My dad was not accepted for a spot in mom's first choice MC community on the basis of his medical record; one of his dementias is associated with having challenging behaviors. My mom was justifiably upset, but it turned out to be a blessing. The place that did offer a spot turned out to have staff that were much better trained and experienced at keeping residents calm with minimal medication although they did have a geri-psych on staff. 

HB