Depression Question

Denise1847

I find myself going in and out of depression. I have gone to a therapist with some success.  I am trying to fight it with walking, good diet, reading, exercising, pray, reaching out to talk to people.  I really don't want to ask for medications as I am afraid of side effects etc, especially when the basis for depression is the situation, not a chemical issue.   It sometimes affects my appetite and, of course, my energy and desire to do things.  Has anyone tried medications?  What are your thoughts and experiences with antidepressants for our situation?

Thank you.

Ed1937

Denise, I'm sorry it's so hard for you. I never took antidepressants, but I know others have taken them with good results. I'm sure others will chime in about their own experiences.

Iris L.

I fell into a deep depression when I was told thst I had to accept that I had dementia.  My fear was that I was going to die soon.  What got me out of my depression, after nine months, was reading posts from the members and posting myself and being responded to.   I was communicating with people in the same situation I was in.  I finally decided that I if I had dementia, I was not going out like a victim.  I was going to get control.  No, I could not get control of a disease process, but I could control my response to it!  I decided to learn what I needed to do for myself and then to do it.  This made all the difference in the depression.  I no longer felt helpless or hopeless.  There is more I can tell you if you are interested.

Antidepressants can be useful in situational depressions.  They help you function, to get you over a hump of life. 

Iris L.

M1

Denise, there is so much about the brain that is still unknown.  Your response to every situation is chemical, and we're not in complete controf of it. There's an overlap for everyone between stress and depression, and i think a good analogy is like being overdrawn at the bank:  if you've got plenty of resources, you pay a $12 electric bill and dont think twice. But if you've wrecked your car, your house burned down, and your daughter over spent without telling you, that same $12 electric bill can feel like the end of the world.  Antidepressants help recoup those internal resources. It's not moral failure to need one..  Would you feel guilty about taking an antibiotic for pneumonia? You won't know unless you try.

Nowhere

Denise, I’m like you and was hesitant to take an antidepressant for a situational problem. 

My story- I started taking Prozac between my mom’s and dad’s deaths this past 1 1/2 years as I was having dark thoughts and feelings, also was not sleeping well. At that point I was caring for my 98 year old dad who was wrought with grief for having lost his beloved wife of seventy eight tears and assisting my husband in memory care by showering, cleaning his room, and changing his sheets. He would not accept nor welcome aides into his memory care room. The medication helped me to feel more numb and get additional sleep through my father’s subsequent passing. I did not experience any physical side effects. I miss him terribly, but I am no longer caring for him thru his depression/grief and at times senior dementia (in our case much different than my husband’s Alzheimers). A few months ago I started noticing that the drug was leaving me with flat emotions and so I chose to slowly ween off. Today, I’m sleeping well (most nights) and feel much more in control. This past month I’ve purchased a good used bike and have rediscovered the joy of riding in fresh air and sunshine.  Important to know, I think, that the medicine won’t make you happy, rather just less depressed and anxious. How are you coping with your depression? I was experiencing sometimes debilitating sadness and stress. I stopped taking care of me.  I started on a very low dose 5mg and after a few weeks increased just a bit as my brain adjusted to 10 mg. Still a very low dose. Point being it was explained that some people seek happiness and end up seeking higher doses or end up thinking antidepressants don’t help. If the drug isn’t effectively helping, taking more of it usually futile. If you aren’t helped by one brand, it could just be the wrong choice for you. There are many different compounds and another might be the key. I’d encourage you to talk to your doctor about your symptoms. Good luck! 

storycrafter

I tried several different meds over the years with only partial success and lots of miserable side effects my sensitive body couldn't tolerate. I decided to go without meds and gradually sank into a dark place. I eventually realized I needed help. Found I could tolerate a lower dose of a med called, Bupropion, in a smaller dose; a little different type of med from the others.

For me, this particular med does not affect my feelings and moods; I continue to have them as always. But the bit of extra energy it provides has been a real blessing. It gives me the energy to deal with things; to do volunteer service, to find an excellent grief/dementia counselor, and to try something I never thought was possible, reach out to a physical trainer to help me get moving. I also started a small flexible tech job which connects me with others. All these things boost my morale and I'm able to feel hope again.

Wishing you strength, comfort, and energy to do some helpful self care.

Denise1847

Thank you Ed.   May you have peaceful day and God bless.

Denise1847

Thank you Iris.  You are an inspiration to me.   May you continue to be strong and brave.  Iris, may you feel God's presence walking with you and giving you peace and continued strength.

Denise1847

Hi M1,

Thank you for your response, which is very helpful.   My reason for trying not to use antidepressants is that I have had some serious drug reactions to some unrelated medications for nerve pain.  Your explanation is so helpful and I feel better about considering them. 

My husband takes Buprion and I have read about it.  It is one of the meds with the least side effects.   

I am so grateful for your response and others' who are sharing.  It really makes a difference to know you are not alone in this sea of despair.

God bless and thank you.

Denise1847

Thank you so much for your thoughtful response.   I am so very grateful for people like yourself who are willing to share their experiences.   It helps to learn about other's experiences and to see the possibilities.  

I just want to feel that I can get through the day with some sense of hope and "normal" feelings.  I believe hearing all of the other experiences on this site gives me a great appreciation with the resilence of others, particularly yourself.

Another Day

Denise 1847 - I tried prescription antidepressants a long time ago and couldn't handle it. I wasn't depressed any longer, just loopy, I couldn't function at all. 

After a lot of research I discovered a natural antidepressant which actually is working for me and my DH. Ashwagandha is a herb and has been known for thousands of years. It's beneficial for relieving stress and anxiety. It also supports brain health as in memory and focus. It has numerous other benefits, you can do the research on those. If you should decide to try this for yourself, make sure you buy ORGANIC and from a reputable source. BTW - it also helps with sleep. 

It sounds like you're doing very similar to what I'm doing, as for diet we're organic as much as we can, only grass fed beef, pastured pork and free range chicken and eggs, and we try to enjoy cold water fish at least twice a week. Reading, you nailed it on that one, research everything you can about this situation you find yourself in. Praying - I doubt there's many here who don't talk to God on a regular basis, I know I do. Exercise is a weakness for me because of physical limitations, I do try though. You're doing a good job reaching out. This site has opened my eyes to so much that I honestly had no clue tied into dementia and Alzheimer's, the people here genuinely care. 

I don't know if we're supposed to tell on this site where we get our supplements, but I guess you could private message me if you want to know more. 

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

Just Bill

The best way to combat depression is to find a stupid human trick and try to improve your skill every day with practice. It doesn't matter what it is or how good or bad you are at it. The process of putting in time to practice and seeing skill improvement over time is rewarding. The process also releases natural feel good chemicals into the brain. Our situations release enough feel bad chemicals into our brains it seems natural to offset that balance with feel good chemicals. Every morning I do an hour of golf swing drills and breathing exercises. It doesn't matter how many bad chemicals are floating around in my head my first set of drills starts the feel good process. By the end of the hour I am blissed out naturally. If my wife really drags me through the mud emotionally I can better handle because a) I worked out this morning and still feel good and b) No matter how bad it gets today I can look forward to my hour of bliss in the morning. Stupid human trick is a bit David Letterman used to do. I use the term for any learned skill from juggling to playing music to memorizing data, any unique skill set that takes time practice and motivation to get good at. Find something you suck at and dedicate yourself to getting better at it and you will be happier more often than you are not.

F&E

I have had very good results with a psychiatrist managing my depression medication.With out them I am completely stopped in my tracks .with them I function and care for my late stage Alz.wife for the last 8 years .they improve my mood and outlook.so I say if you need them use them.don’t continue suffering.take care of yourself

Denise1847

Thank you.   I am so glad you are doing better.   It is helpful to hear there is light at the end of this tunnel.

Denise1847

Thank you so much for your suggestion about ashwaganda.   I will check it out.  Thank you for your willingness to share your experience with me.  I pray you continue to progress.

Denise1847

Thank you F and E.   I hope your situation continues to improve and thank you for sharing with me.

Iris L.

Denise1847 wrote:

I just want to feel that I can get through the day with some sense of hope and "normal" feelings.  

Thank you for posting this topic, Denise; as you can see, many of us are dealing with this challenge.  In fact, I believe that depression is endemic to dealing with and living with dementia.  I have seen a lot of depression on these pages.

Depression can be said to be about being hopeless and helpless.  Finding a sense of hope can help.   Can we hope for an immediate cure?  This is not likely.  But we can hope for other things.  As time goes on, what we hope for will change.  As for "normal" feelings, whatever you are feeling is normal for you at that time.  Your feelings will change over time, too.  

I think we have a tendency to want to hide from what are called negative feelings, such as grief.  But there can be healing in letting the grief flow through us.  It won't be bottled up.  There are a lot threads about anticipatory grief.

It is important to find a therapist who understands dementia, because it is different from other diseases.  A good resource can be talking things over with a Care Consultant on the Helpline.  They can advise and suggest local resources who are knowledgeable about dementia.

Also, I suggest you read about seasonal affective disorder.   It has to do with the lack of sunlight and lack of sleep.  Even though we are in daylight savings time now and spring is approaching, it can help you to learn about getting more sunlight and more sleep. 

Don't think you have to do everything yourself.  You can't.  None of us can.

Everything I am suggesting to you, I have done for myself, with good results.  I wish you good results too, Denise!

If you have a therapist, these are some of the things they are supposed to talk about with you.  At the same time, if you read a lot of posts, as you are doing, you will see some commonality, and answers to your own situation will leap out at you.  This is how it happened for me.

Iris

Iris L.

Just Bill wrote:

The best way to combat depression is to find a stupid human trick and try to improve your skill every day with practice. It doesn't matter what it is or how good or bad you are at it. The process of putting in time to practice and seeing skill improvement over time is rewarding. The process also releases natural feel good chemicals into the brain. Our situations release enough feel bad chemicals into our brains it seems natural to offset that balance with feel good chemicals. 

Thanks so much for posting this tactic, Bill!  It is a good reminder of the uplifting and motivational neurochemicals.  I did a form of this many years ago, when facing a different major stress in my life.  Depression caused me to lose all sense of pleasure.  I don't know any tricks.   But I did have a tiny relic of pleasure in two areas.  1) I enjoyed my breakfast oatmeal, with raisins and cinnamon. 2) I watched the soap opera, The Young and The Restless.  Those fictional characters seemed like my only friends.  Those two factors became my reasons for getting out of bed in the morning.  I built on these two small pleasures and gradually grew out of the depression.

What you call stupid human trick I have called "conscious positivity".  I have to consciously seek out positivity for myself, because I am surrounded by negativity.  Negativity is like smog, it's all around.  Conscious positivity is like my oxygen tank.  I need positive wiffs throughout my day.

Iris

Palmetto Peg

I am taking an antidepressant, but I am not sure if it is enough.  I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and I will discuss it with the doctor.  My issue is more anxiety than depression.  I find myself going over and over how I am going to manage this.  What will I do?  What about me?  I know most of us have these feelings, but at times they feel overwhelming!

mrl

Hi Denise,

This unfortunately comes with the territory. I have been Stage 8 a little over two years and cry still every day. Have done all I know as far as Griefshare, therapy, self help  books etc. I guess it just runs its own course.

I have been on .25 Xanax thru all this and though it doesn't help my crying or broken heart, it is a lifesaver for panic and antisocial anxiety. I wish you the best.

Michele 

Another Day

Victoria 2020 - Ashwagandha is not new, it's also not a product of big pharma. You see, I'm not a doctor, therefore I cannot prescribe any big pharma drug. By nature I love to read, could also be known as research and I started reading up on everything I could find about this disease. Along the way, I discovered some "natural" alternatives for depression, stress relief etc. and decided to give them a try. What did I have to lose? I was already tweaking our diet, hydration, exercise or lack thereof and what vitamins and supplements we were taking. 

Try looking up the word Ashwagandha by itself and do be sure to use reputable sites. The pharma version of anti-depressants didn't work so well for me, Ashwagandha is working and I'll keep using it. I will say one thing, this disease is an education in and of itself. 

danapuppy

For me depression, hopelessness, and so many other presentations were stressing me toward self destructive thoughts. I felt a sense of worthlessness, nadequcy, and shame because I could not lift myself out of the dispair. I convenced myself that taking psyic meds was admission of failure to control. Claiming the potential side effects was a way of rationalizing doing nothing and wallowing in depression. A helpful mental health professional put it like this, "which is worse letting depression take your life or maybe dealing with side affects?"

Meds took the edge off and gave time needed to regain self-control. Prayer and time spent with God gave strength to wiene off the meds.

Another Day

Denise 1847 and all - We all missed a good antidepressant, grandchildren! We had two of ours yesterday for about three hours. One just turned 2 and the other 6 months. What an amazing transformation in how DH and I both felt.

Ed1937

AD, that's a great point about grandchildren Also petting the dog or cat can release dopamine, which makes you feel better.

Denise1847

Hi Iris,

Thank you for your thoughts and suggestions.   It is very helpful to hear from people who have more experience than I with these struggles.  I hope you are doing well.

Denise1847

Thank you for your post.   I know that if I didn't believe in God, I would not be here today.   I have grown much closer to God in the last few years.   I truly feel him with me and I remind myself how much he suffered for me and that this is but a temporary blip in the course of an eternity.

farmrox

Hi Denise,

My husband has just been diagnosed with Alzheimer's 1 week ago.  This past week I had a hypertensive crisis where my blood pressure shot up to 180/100 (I don't or didn't have high blood pressure).  I just stepped down from my full-time manager job to enjoy retirement with my husband.  Needless to say, I am now on bp meds and asked to be put on an antidepressant/antianxiety med.  Under the circumstances, I FEEL I need help even with medication, to help me handle the stress of the unknown future.  You don't have to stay on the meds forever.  It is there to help you stand up to face the challenges of the day.  Think of it as a bridge to connect you to a more stable place, when you can consider coming off the meds. Of course, this is a very individual decision.  Good luck on whatever you decide!