New to the site

GodIsGood2Me2023

Hello everyone! I’m new to this site. My brother and I along with my Mother was informed by a Neuropsychologist last week that she has early stage of Alzheimer’s. She still lives in her home with my brother. 

The doctor mentioned to me about getting a POA in place which I’ve never done before. Not sure if there are other legal documents that I need to have completed along with the POA. I mainly take care of all her finances, medical, groceries and things that needs done around the house. 

Just looking to build some connections with others who are dealing with the same issues as me and to see if someone has any suggestions or advice. Thank you!

BookBuffBex

Hi! I'm new here too. Shortly before receiving my mom's official ALZ diagnosis, I worked with an elder care attorney and had new wills, POA, and Healthcare/advance directive paperwork drawn up; as well as creation of a Revocable Trust for all their assets. This put all tangible property (car, home, bank accounts) in the name of the trust, which combined with activated POA, allowed me to move them into AL and sell their condo. The rules/paperwork may vary depending on what state you live in. It can be kind of a PITA to deal with all the paperwork, but in the end it is so worthwhile to have the full legal control. If your mom is still capable of making decisions and signing for herself, it is worthwhile to do it as soon as possible. This will help ensure your mom's wishes are met and if you have siblings, that you can maybe divide up the responsibilities. Maybe one of you takes ownership of the home, or is financial POA, but the other is the healthcare proxy.

Your mom's neuropsych practice likely has a social worker. Ask the social worker for a list of resources for senior citizens. Or see if your state has a Dept of Health & Human Services with a division for elder care. They often have lists of resources. If your town has a senior center, that is a good place for resources too. Good Luck!

CanyonGal

Once you have Durable Power of Attorney (DPOA) and medical Power of Attorney and other legal documents, store them in a safe place. Create (scan) a digital copy (a PDF) and print off copies to keep with you. You will need them to show that you have the right to make decisions on your parent's behalf at medical appointments and financial services. I had to show the DPOA to cash a $50 check, to contest charges on her credit card, and to get doctors to talk with me at hospitalizations. Almost always my mother was there with me physically but unable to process what was being said by the doctor or to understand why we don't give out credit card information,and other issues. Your parent unfortunately will lose cognitive skills as time passes and the earliest you can get this completed, the better prepared you will be.

We tried dividing up responsibilities on the documents with siblings but within the first year everything was placed in my name with an alternate sibling listed if something happened to me. Not all siblings are cut out for the responsibilities especially when they become time consuming. The armchair quarterbacking never goes away.

mlowe6

I just finished this entire process with my parents. I did my stuff for them through Legal Zoom, which if you can read and have a basic understanding of simple law is very easy and affordable to do. They also have lawyers in your state that can counsel you. Just make sure you have everything notarized and your POA recorded at the county recorders office. I carry their POA on me at all times just in case I need it and have forwarded it to the life ins. Co. Medical personnel, their medical insurance co even their car and mortgage company because my mom cancelled the mortgage insurance without telling me and they went 2 months without mortgage insurance on their house and I had to quickly reinstate the day they got the letter from the mortgage company stating they had no insurance. So the POA gives you the ability to take care of the things they are unable to do. I also did a Hippa form, Last Will and Testament, Advance Medical directive, Living Will and a Trust all at an affordable rate and with just a little guidance.

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GodIsGood2Me2023

Thank you for the responses everyone. I really appreciate it.

TheCatWantsOut

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/169390#Comment_169390

Overall would you recommend Legal Zoom for this process? I spoke to an Elder Care Attorney who quoted $8,500 for a Financial Power of Attorney, Medical Power of Attorney, and Trust. Legal Zoom offers a package of all three for $249. It looks to me like they are simple forms to fill out that I could do in about 20 minutes. I'm not even sure the trust makes sense so it could be even less if I just do the other two.

I think the hardest part of the process will be finding two witnesses and a notary. My mother is basically home bound and I live far away, so I'm not sure how to go about getting those resources organized.

harshedbuzz

One of the downsides to Legal Zoom or any other boiler plate documents is that they may not allow you to do the sorts of things you will need to do going forward.

We saw a CELA who knew that I would need to sell my parents' homes for them, access banking and investments and eventually place dad so she wrote the documents in such a way that I could easily. While their 3 banks and their investment company did require copies of the documents for their legal departments to review, they were accepted which is not always the case.

If you won't be doing these things in multiple states, you might be OK. The other benefits to the CELA:

1. She explained the Medicaid planning process in a way that we could understand. This is huge unless you have unlimited funds for care.
2. She vetted the offers on one of the houses and helped mom complete the settlement papers which we overnighted saving me another 8 hour round trip.
3. She reviewed the contract for the MCF in which we placed dad. She's been in many of the area LTC facilities and was able to recommend a few to us that she felt were better than others.

MN Chickadee

I would 100% recommend seeing an elder law attorney. They will make sure all documents are in order that may be applicable, and will also help with financial planning for paying for long term care if she should ever need it, including help in the home if you plan to keep her at the house. Everyone's situation is different - their finances, the benefits they qualify for, their resources, assets, legal liabilities. You want tailored advice from a lawyer. If you think she may run out of money for care if she should need to be moved to a facility you want to fully understand Medicaid in your state for assistance with long term care, and an attorney will have the advice on this program which is specific to each state. You want an air tight durable power of attorney, and it's best that whoever is medical POA also be POA for finances or else siblings can really run into disagreements when the person who is the main caregiver cannot make financial decisions. You may also want to have her sign a HIPAA release with her doctor and health system so it is easy for you to communicate with any clinics without having to jump through POA hoops, it makes it much easier when you encounter random staff who aren't familiar with this stuff, they will just see the privacy release on file and you'll be good to go.

mlowe6

I do recommend them and they have lawyers in every state available to assist you at a reasonable fee if need be. They helped me with some very personal items that I needed to address and told me how to do it over the phone for no additional fee. Even if you have to pay an additional fee it will be nothing to compared to what you’re looking at. My husband and my parents neighbor or a person at your bank can be a witness and the bank where you bank will do the notary for free. Then you can have it filed with your Recorders office for a small fee. Our fee at recorders office was $55.00. I have had no issues with any of the POA that I have had to give out because they are all legal.

mlowe6

As far as Medicaid and their home our daughter is already on the title of their home and have full survivor rights and we are aware of medicaids 5 yr look back period no matter what. So we felt like there was nothing more we could do to manage our expectations or secure what little bit they had nor could we afford anything else. We were very happy with there service and know what to expect in the future.