Staring off in to space

ErikaK

My dad has been living with us since mid-pandemic (9/2020) and used to like listening to music and reading cooking magazines in the mornings no problem. I have tried lots of things, like folding towels - his executive function isn't there anymore so he can't do that, coloring - he hates that, he has never liked puzzles even when I was a kid. He enjoys the music but I feel like he'll look at 2 or three pages, then just stare off into space. He likes watching baseball on TV but I feel bad about putting him in front of the TV all day long. I know he stares off into nothing trying to process what's happening and not understanding. I just feel guilty because I work in a home office during the day and can't get him engaged in anything for more than a few minutes.

M1

The inability to engage is very difficult in the home setting. It may bother you more than it bothers him, though. Would he be open to a day program? Just a thought. One of the advantages (there aren't many) of memory care are the oppportunities for socialization, but that depends so much on the personality of your loved one. My partner is now in memory care and does not engage in the activities offered. the only thing she likes to do is to help the staff.

CanyonGal

M1, I had to laugh a bit at your post. My mom would only go to Bingo when she was in assisted living. She eventually made a few friends at her dining room table. She would monopolize the staff in conversations or complaints as if she was running the place.

In memory care she refuses to be a friend to anyone,refuses to do activities unless it is music, and is picky about which staff she wants to help her. Some of her negative traits are really forefront and I feel like I have a child-like adult toddler. Communication has really changed with her entering stage 7 and has become bed bound.

ErikaK

Yeah we suggested the adult day setting to him but he isn't a social person, never has been. We have some respite help and he just sits quietly with them too.