Day to day

JC5

Still working on the bedroom odor issue but have messaged doctor. We will see. Just feeling more and more distant from DH. Conversations are nowhere, definitely feeling he’s not really engaged . Trying my best to keep him engaged in daily activities. He says he doesn’t know what to do so I write down simple tasks but he forgets to look at list or accuses me of “yelling at him and telling him what to do” . It still breaks my heart to see what is happening to him. I’m now caring for a man who never really cared about me but I will be there for him. It’s just hard . And I did look into the CareBlazers program. Just wish I had the money a bit steep for me but looks intriguing.

Denise1847

Dear JC5, Your post resonated with me in that we have been married 50 years and I am pretty sure that my husband would not be caring for me if I was the one with the disease. It makes it more difficult to struggle through the caregiving. Nevertheless, I will forge ahead and do my best. My husband gets bored but really doesn't want to do much but have me take him out for lunches, dinners or rides. So JC5, I have learned to guard my peace and health to the very best of my ability. Trying to make him happy by constantly offering him activities is a waste of my effort and nothing will really make him happy or better. I have long ago given up on trying to get him to eat what is healthy for him, although I always cook healthy meals. The doctor said to let him eat what he wants. He is very stubborn so when he had a retina detachment and wouldn't keep his head down during the recovery period, he lost sight in his eye. I do my best and I feel badly for him. I just hope I can survive his disease. I read alot and that has helped me escape my reality. Try a good book and see if that helps. Please take care of yourself and don't put pressure on yourself and guard your sanity and health. I hope my experience helps you in some way. God bless you.

JC5

Oh Denise 1847 you have no idea how much I appreciate your post! Thank you! We too will be married 50 years in October and I feel there is no point to ”celebrate”. I try my best and am learning that my efforts are a waste of time. Thank you for your support and caring!

Ed1937

JC, I'm sorry it's so hard. I think most of our LOs feel like they're always being told what to do. If you mention the list to him again, maybe try to word it so he understands it's up to him if he wants to follow it or not. "I was just looking at that list we made for you (NOT "Don't forget we made a list for you"). "Would you like to look at it?" Just a thought.

Does everyone find the bold type easier to read?

Buggsroo

I get where you ladies have gone with this. My husband is just a shell of a man. He pees on the floor and leaves turds about. So the bloom is off the rose. Luckily the trazadone has kicked in and he is more approachable. I can change his diaper when he is calm. He gets quite gnarly before the happy pills kick in.

Our 33rd anniversary was in March, he was totally oblivious and sadly I feel lonely with him because he is gone. Sadly the type of Alzheimer’s my husband has, is not the pleasant kind. He can get nasty at times. I am sorry that the good times are gone but this disease takes no prisoners.