Question for Group

LJCHR

DH and I married 14 years ago (I was widow and he widower). We have prenuptial agreements so we don't blend our assets. He retains his accounts, credit cards, etc in his name and I retain mine so we don't go into each others accounts.

My concern is his executive lobe is affected by his dementia and he constantly has difficulties with his computer and phone. He locks himself out of his accounts. He struggles in trying to get back in. I have helped him a few times but only when I've offered and I can reset his password and get his access back. He is either embarrassed or determined to do it himself so he will just leave the account locked rather than ask for my help.

I struggle with offering to help, I don't want to demoralize him.

Any suggestions on how to handle this?

Ed1937

My two cents: let him leave the account locked, or if he has children, let them know what is happening. Who has financial and medical POA?

LJCHR

His children have financial responsibility thru Will and his children and I have medical POA.

I like your idea. It takes one less responsibility off of me. Thanks you for your help.

towhee

I have never heard of having financial responsibility through a will. Do you mean a trust? Absolutely let his children know, if he is having trouble getting into accounts he is also probably having trouble making good decisions. He needs his money for his care.

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harshedbuzz

I would urge you to have a meeting with a CELA.

If there's a trust or his children are financial POAs, I would reach out to that person to manage the financial piece. A pre-nup agreement probably doesn't supersede your financial responsibility in a marriage for care. If his children control his money, would they be willing to provide funding for in-home caregivers or a MCF down the line?

HB