When other residents leave AL / MC does mom understand?

RobinNicole

My mom has been in AL for over a year now. She is fully integrated in the community and has friends and is well liked by staff. Lately sadly there have been several departures. A few folks passed, and a few folks are moving to families homes or out of state. Today one of my moms best friends had to say good bye and when she got to my mom she cried as she loves my mom. Mom hugged her but after she left did not seem sad. I don’t really think she understands. To me and my friend it was incredibly sad. Another woman and her husband are leaving and said she loves being around my mom as it brings joy. Once again don’t think mom got it. She still knows us all and loves the people but the understanding of the people leaving does not seem to really register. I am guessing this is part of the progression, but wanted to ask others.

Emily 123

Hello,

Your mom is probably living very much in the moment, and so while she can understand the friend leaving and being sad at that time, she doesn't have the capacity anymore to make logical thought connections or anticipate how it would affect her future. She is unlikely to be able to remember that they have left. I'm sorry.

terei

Apathy + lack of empathy + other emotions are commonly seen with PWD

RobinNicole

Thank you for the perspectives. It helps. When things are “smooth” its easy to forget (or fool myself) that everything will stay smooth. This is just a new part of mom. We are so lucky in so many ways how well she is doing. Need to roll with this.