I had to say good-bye

Kenzie56

I believe the last time I posted was last March when dh was admitted to hospice care. The love of my life passed away last Thursday, May 25, 2023. I remember reading heartbreaking posts from my fellow community members, but now writing such a post is an out-of-body experience. Words such as "now he is at peace" does not take the sting away. I feel like I am drifting on autopilot. Bruce was only 72 and I thought we would have a wonderful retirement life together. His retirement was filled with fear, confusion, anxiety, inability to speak or comprehend the spoken language and memory loss. I never could have navigated this journey without all of you helping me every step of the way. You gave me great ideas, comfort when I was lost or frightened, and most of all empathy, compassion and understanding. I am now faced with putting one foot in front of the other and face a life without my spouse of 44 years. I just can't seem to stop crying. 😪

Paula Patrick

Davegrant

I am sorry for your loss. I pray that your pain will lessen. Thanks for sharing the obituary.

Dave

Denise1847

I am so sorry. I pray for your peace and comfort during these most difficult times.

toolbeltexpert

I am so sorry for your loss, the obituary is a fitting tribute, and I hope you can get some rest, you did everything you could for your dh.

mrahope

So, so, sorry for the loss of your dear husband. May time bring you some measure of peace as you rest and adjust to the loss.

Beachfan

Been there, done that, just over a month ago. I am so sorry and no, nothing anyone can say will lessen the sting. Your DH, like mine, taught and coached for many years. I was unprepared for the overwhelming turnout by former students, players and even second generation kids he mentored. In the end, I found it comforting and it was the most helpful thing that assisted me in remembering DH as he was before Alz. You can do this; stay strong, lean on your kids and grandkids, and savor the shared memories, tributes and comfort shared with you. One day at a time. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Ed1937

Kenzie, I'm so sorry for your loss. What a great obit! You're right, words don't take the sting away. My wife has been gone for 11 month, and I still dream about her most every night.

I hope you can find peace, think of good times in the past, and look toward the future in the coming times.

Lgw

So sorry for your loss. Your words said exactly what so many of us have felt. My prayers reach out for you.

White Crane

I’m so sorry for the loss of your dear husband. Thank you sharing the obituary. It was a fitting tribute. Praying you find peace and comfort in the coming days.

Mint

Kenzie I’m so very sorry for the loss of your dear husband.

Quilting brings calm

I am so sorry for your loss. There is no one way to grieve - and that’s true no matter what the last years of his life was like. It’s okay to be angry that your planned retirement years were turned upside down, and also feel devastated by his loss. It’s also ok to have good days too.

jfkoc

Thank you for including your husband's obituary....a lovely man.

You have had a tremendous loss. Auto-pilot is going to get you through many days...it is your friend. The sting will lesson in it's own time. Life will go on but forever changed.

Please accept my sympathy...I know how hard your journey is right now.

I hope you will think about staying close to us here especially those of us now in stage 8.

-Judith

Jgirl57

So very sorry; crying is ok and therapeutic . I am glad you found comfort on this forum. This disease is so hard to explain to others and we “ understand” your story. Love and hugs to you and your family.

Jeff86

Heartfelt condolences to you Kenzie on your DH’s passing. You have been an exemplary caregiver and a great contributor to this special community. I hope with time some of the pain of loss subsided and is replaced with loving pre-AD memories.

Pat6177

My sincere condolences. Be kind to yourself as you go through this transition.

Buggsroo

I am so sorry, this nasty disease takes no prisoners. My condolences for your loss.

saltom

Kenzie, I am so sorry for what you are going through now. I am just about two months ahead of you in the process and continue to find this forum a source of comfort and inspiration. Drifting on autopilot is an apt expression. Emotionally it's a roller coaster. I hope you find some peace from the good memories and the legacy of caring your husband gave to the high school sports community. Thank you for sharing the obit.

Joe C.

Kenzie, My sincere condolences on the passing of your husband. May you find some peace in the days ahead.

Sandy1956

Kenzie, my deepest sympathies on the passing of your beloved husband.

ImMaggieMae

Kenzie, I am so sorry for your loss. There are no words…. Just a virtual hug and wishing peace for you and your family.

JoseyWales

Kenzie, I too am so sorry for your loss. Even though we all know how this ends.... it just can't be easy. The obituary was beautiful. Wishing you peace.

jfkoc

thinking of you

Mint

So very sorry for your loss

Dio

Kenzie, so sorry for your loss! As I've always known, the cross is ours to bear alone, even in grief. No one and nothing can take away the sting. May you find strength in your will to live and be comforted in the love of your family and friends.