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Pigs do indeed fly

Imagine my complete and utter surprise when I found out my brother went to go visit Peggy on Saturday! He hasn't seen her since June, 2021.

Staff at Peggy's memory care didn't even realize we have a brother - no one has met him, until yesterday.

I'm always complaining about that guy because he's been MIA for so long. I'm wondering what has changed, or what it is he wants, but for now I'm just going to take it as a gift. Peggy was so happy today when she told me he came by. I know he really did come by because my outside caregiver spoke with him.

Comments

  • M1
    M1 Member Posts: 6,788
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    GG I'm impressed that she remembered that he came. My partner doesn't remember visitors from day to day. Such an odd disease, so different in different people. I'm glad it made both of you happy. You never know when something might change.

  • mommyandme (m&m)
    mommyandme (m&m) Member Posts: 1,468
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    Gothic, glad your brother stopped in. Does this mean you two might reconnect also?

  • Beachfan
    Beachfan Member Posts: 797
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    My “little brother” lives out of state, so DH and I didn’t see him often enough. When I texted him the night DH died, he texted back, “I’m so sorry, Lynn. I loved him like a big brother.” It broke my heart.

    So glad your brother visited and that Peggy knew and remembered. Hopefully, it will continue.

  • Jgirl57
    Jgirl57 Member Posts: 486
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    Oh wow; time will tell but I am glad you are taking it as gift.

  • GothicGremlin
    GothicGremlin Member Posts: 857
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    @M1 - so true. It's such a weird disease. At first I didn't even believe it was my brother who was there. There's a new guy in memory care and Peggy is convinced he's our brother. He looks nothing like our brother. 😄 So when L really did show up, I thought Peggy was talking about the guy in memory care. Thanks to my caregiver, I knew it really was L.

    @mommyandme (m&m) The phrase "when hell freezes over" comes to mind with regard to him. I've told him that at a minimum he needs to apologize to me. I should require amends to be made, but I know that that's not going to happen, so I'd settle for the minimum. I've never heard him apologize to anyone ever, so I doubt that he's going to change. I wouldn't take such a hard line on an apology, but truthfully if I gave the laundry list of stuff he's done to me over the last almost decade, I don't think anyone would fault me for wanting at least an apology.

    Thank you, @Beachfan I hope the same. I'm hoping it continues as well. Thing is, Peggy's condition has changed so much over the last two years, it wouldn't surprise me if it freaked him out. Peggy has a difficult time communicating now, most of her vocabulary is gone. Those of us who see her often can usually figure out what she's trying to tell us, but it's only because we're so close. So yeah, fingers crossed.

    @Jgirl57 It's really the only way I can look at it. Pretty much any interaction by anyone I consider a gift. I was telling a friend about Peggy's friends, her veterinarian, her ex-boss at work who come to see her. He said "it's a testament to Peggy herself, that these people are rallying around her." I had to agree.

  • Anonymousjpl123
    Anonymousjpl123 Member Posts: 695
    500 Comments 100 Likes 100 Care Reactions Second Anniversary
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    I love these little miracles/victories! This is such an up and down/roller coaster disease we literally need these little bits of joy to keep going. Even if you and your brother never talk, I am so happy you and our sister got a spark of happiness.

  • FloydSnax
    FloydSnax Member Posts: 96
    10 Comments First Anniversary 5 Care Reactions
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    A little bit of good news can go a long way!!! Happy for you

  • forbarbara
    forbarbara Member Posts: 176
    100 Likes 100 Comments 25 Care Reactions First Anniversary
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    It takes a saint to see his reappearance as a gift. You’re the real deal!

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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