Basic question - how to respond?

secondcor521

Hi all.

My 87yo LO has mid- to late-Alz/VD.

I had a thread recently about unrealistic travel plans and on that thread I learned about anosognosia, which I think he exhibits.

He of course was there when the doctor diagnosed him, and we've mentioned dementia to him in the past. But he's also very very forgetful nowadays.

The past week or so he has been saying that he's really confused, foggy headed, doesn't know what in the h*** is going on and similar comments.

Is it better to respond patiently, directly and probably repeatedly "Dad, you have dementia and that's why you feel that way", or sympathetically and distractedly, "Yeah, that must be frustrating and scary. Oh hey, did I tell you my kid hit a home run in the baseball game the other day?"

Thanks for any input.

M1

The latter. There's no point in telling him he has dementia, he will only be offended and get defensive.

harshedbuzz

The latter.

My approach was to validate his feelings first and ask him if there was something I could do to help. Then, I would redirect to something he liked to hear about or some kind of snack.

HB

ladygrayfox

> @harshedbuzz said:
> ...or some kind of snack.

Everyone's always ready for a snack! <3

secondcor521

Thanks everyone. That's what I've mostly done lately.

For someone who grew up from being an obnoxious little know-it-all, it's difficult not to give the answer to a question when I know it. But for his benefit I can do it.

Thanks again.