Stage 5 clothing issues

tigersmom

Hi, everybody. I am wondering if others have dealt with an issue that is driving me crazy and has been going on for a while now. The issue is what my DH will wear when he is at home. When we go out, he is fine dressing as he always has -- t-shirt, cargo pants, fleece jacket on top for warmth. At home is a different story. For the last few years, the only pants he will wear at home are worn-out cotton martial arts pants. And I mean so worn out that the drawstring that ties them together has worn through the fabric and they gap for 12 inches at the top. He looks like Urkel, or that kid from Bad Santa with a wedgie. He had several pairs of pants he used to wear at at home -- fleece ones for winter, loose cotton sweatpants for summer. Now he won't wear any of them. They are all

a) too hot

b) too hard

c) not comfortable

d) all of the above

Clearly, this is a texture issue, but I am at my wits' end every time he gets dressed after a shower. I have discarded two of the three pairs of martial arts pants, but he had a meltdown when the third pair was in the washer and not available. He will not wear anything with an elastic waist, which lets out a lot of casual pants. I finally found some new cotton drawstring karate pants online and bought three pairs but he won't wear them: "Too hard." Most pajama pants have elastic waists in addition to a drawstring. I know this doesn't seem like a huge problem, but he likes to go outside on the deck and talk with our neighbors, who also happen to be our landlords. Doing that with your underpants showing is not a great look. Also, I want him to be comfortable at home. Does anyone have any suggestions? Honestly, I am sort of looking forward to the day when he won't care what he wears.

Ed1937

Does the landlord know he has dementia? If so, don't stress yourself out worrying about what he wears. You might ask the neighbors if the way he dresses bothers them. Explain that he simply doesn't have the judgement he once had. If they're fine with it, DO NOT WORRY ABOUT IT! Otherwise you might have to limit the times he goes out there to avoid the neighbors.

If he does things that don't hurt anything, just accept that that's the way it is going to be. Accepting things that are not typically considered kosher will put you on a path that is less stressful.

jfkoc

I had to look up martial arts pants. I vote for them and you can order from someplace like amazon. they are soft and easy on off so one is comfortable and can pull them sown to use to bathroom.

harshedbuzz

The all-cotton double weave fabric used in higher end martial arts gear develops am almost brushed hand with wear and washing. I wonder if you could hasten the process chemically and mechanically.

How To Soften Stiff Cotton Fabric - Consort Design (consort-design.com)

PlentyQuiet

Scrub pants. They are soft, lightweight, and have a drawstring waist. If he likes them you can buy multiple identical pairs. Walmart, specialty scrub shops, or online purchase

ghphotog

When my DW started wearing the same clothes day in and day out, even to bed, it bothered me at first but then I thought who cares. Is it illegal to wear your jeans to bed every night? No, so let this sleeping dog lie and don't worry about it. There will be far more things to worry about in this ordeal. Let them wear what they are comfortable in and as long as it's not insanely inappropriate don't lose any sleep over it.

GG06

My husband wears the same clothes everyday too. Before he was diagnosed it drove me batty, but now it doesn't bother me. I did have to make a pair of jeans with holes in the trunk part disappear. I've purchased similar clothing that I think he will wear, but still reverts back to the same old ones.

harshedbuzz

Could you have the old pants repaired?

Denise1847

My husband wears the same stuff most of the time. I go through his closet periodically and do the "sniff test" then throw the shirts and jeans in the washer. He doesn't ever notice. As previous posts have indicated, just let it go. We cannot expect normal as we are all in Alzheimer's land.

tigersmom

Big thanks to everyone for their helpful suggestions. To answer a few questions, for Ed: Yes, our landlords are aware of his diagnosis, and they are very kind. For HB: I am going to start washing the three new pairs constantly and hope that they will soften up eventually. I am also going to see if I can restitch the tops of the ancient ones. That may be possible. And for Plenty Quiet,, thank you for the suggestion of scrubs. I actually thought of that at one point, but didn't follow up. I am going to order some black ones and hope for the best! Thanks again to all who rang in. This forum makes me feel like no matter what the problem, you always have company, and helpful ideas. I am grateful.

SDianeL

maybe these but they are expensive. https://ecochoices.com/products/mens-organic-cotton-drawstring-lounge-pants-s-m-l-xl-2xl-2xl

SDianeL

One thing I've noticed with my DH is that his skin is very sensitive to the touch. Covers bother him. He also wears the same comfy shirt all the time at home. He does change clothes to go out. I do take him a clean shirt and wash the comfy one so he can put it back on.

tigersmom

OMG, SDianeL, those pants look perfect! Exactly what I am looking for! I am measuring his waist and ordering a pair immediately. If they work, I will get multiples. Thank you so much for this suggestion; I am not familiar with this site. I think I will be soon, though , because I think my DH has the same skin ultra-sensitivity as yours does.