Look on the bright side?

CorrieG

I was especially frustrated with my DH so I told myself to think of 10 good things in our situation and I thought I would share. I admit some of these are sardonic but it was what I could think of!

1. My DH has finally forgotten that I accidentally erased his entire digital music collection in 2006.
2. I can tell all of my old funny stories again and he'll laugh all over again!
3. I no longer forget what time it is because I'm asked so many times.
4. Each good moment means so much more to me now. I am more grateful and don't take things for granted.
5. We no longer argue about who is doing the dishes or taking out the garbage. It's always going to be me and my acceptance of this has made me less resentful.
6. My mother in law no longer doubts my commitment to our marriage and is grateful for me.
7. I stopped procrastinating and hired a lawyer to make our wills, POAs, etc. It's a relief.
8. Since I always make the meals, we eat food we both like.
9. I can give my DH the same gift multiple times and he's always excited!
10. Because I was unwilling to learn patience my own, God has blessed me with a situation that forces me to learn patience.

M1

I like your list Corrie. Motivates me to come up with my own......

GothicGremlin

I like your list too.

In my case I think that my gallows sense of humor is one of the few things that keeps me sane.

M1

Three things occur to me after visiting today:

One is that it is at least better that I can visit my partner now unaccompanied, after nearly a year of not being able to do so at her other facility.

The second is that is it a blessing that she has no sense of time, so that when I tell her I will be back "tomorrow" it doesn't matter if I miss a day. Ditto for the fiblet that she is there for physical therapy for her back.

The third is that it is wonderful that she still loves me and doesn't blame me for being where she is.

CorrieG

M1, I love your list- I think it’s amazing when we can still feel each other’s love through all of this!

ButterflyWings

CorrieG, there are many angels among our forum mates. I mean that. One of them is not posting anymore I don't think, but is in Stage 8 and hopefully doing very well. Her name is LadyTexan and if you can figure out the search function to pull up old posts better than I have been able to, you will see what I mean.

I think LadyT must have sent you to us, as she regularly blessed us all with her insightful gratitude lists. I missed her spirit and true gift of gratitude and her amazing lists once her young onset DH passed away and she wasn't posting daily anymore. Being intentional about pausing to think this way every so often is such a beautiful reminder to look for both the lesson and the blessing, in all things. I am so immersed in 24/7 at late 6, early 7 with my beloved, so I need all the reminders I can get! Prompts to practice an attitude of gratitude is a good reminder. And your list made me laugh out loud! Several times. Thank you for being you, though I am very sorry you need to be here. And thank you again for this flashback to one of our forum mates who taught me so much!

CorrieG

ButterflyWings, thank you so much- I am sorry we have lost LadyTexan. Your comments made me smile. I feel appreciated and loved which doesn't happen very often lately!

Palmetto Peg

I loved the list, too! I am guilty of only thinking about the negatives, but this is a good reminder to find some positives along the way, too. Here are some of mine!

1. My DH is grateful for everything that I do for him. He tells me every day that he couldn't do this without me.
2. My kids have stepped up and are much more present in my life. They call often and check in on how we are doing, and visit when they can.
3. I, too, always know the time and the day of the week because I am asked so often!
4. I am able to take care of my DH without the pressure of also having to work, as many on this forum do.
5. I am in charge and get to make all of the decisions. If I want a pink couch, I can buy a pink couch!
6. We have decent healthcare, so I can get medical help when he needs it.
7. My DH still showers and brushes his teeth without any prompting from me! I know this is a biggie!
8. MY DH sleeps quite a bit during the day, so I have time to read or do something I like.
9. If I am short tempered and snap at him, he forgets quickly.
10. Right now it is summer and we have long, sunny days and can enjoy just sitting outside.

Thanks for making me think of the good things in my life!!

CorrieG

I really want to see this pink couch! Your list made me think of other things I could be grateful for- thanks!

upstateAnn

I am grateful for conversations like this morning. my DH talked about what he misses. He said he misses being fully with me…. I am so happy he still remembers.

Emily 123

My very independent, non-demonstrative mother lets me help her up and down steps, and holds my hand afterwards. It makes me happy.