Pre-grief

Jeanne C.

Today the husband of a family friend passed after a year of illness and 2 days on hospice. I'm not close to the husband but it hit me hard. I feel so much for our friend. But it occurred to me that I was crying for me. Watching another woman become an early widow (like me, she's in her early fifties), made me so sad for myself (way to go Jeanne, making someone else's problem your own). I think this is the worst thing about caring for a LO with a chronic illness. We mourn a little almost every day.

When my DH saw I was upset, he didn't say a word. He just stood up, took my hand, and pulled me into a slow dance ("our house" by CSN was playing). At his core, at least for now, he's still in there.

I know you get it.

Ed1937

Jeanne, your emotions are understandable. This disease is a very long grieving experience.

I'm glad DH was able to console you. You'll remember that.

toolbeltexpert

Jeanne I understand what you're saying, I sometimes grieve every time I leave the mcf. But you got such a sweet memory, I was like wow that's so precious.

Jeff86

Every day a little death, as the Stephen Sondheim song title says (song is way off topic)

love your self-deprecation, btw, Jeanne. It is all about us caregivers, isn’t it? 😉