Need some laundry advice for beginning incontinence

tigersmom

Hello again, fellow travelers. We are dealing with the beginning of urinary incontinence -- usually a few hours after dinner. I have read many threads on this topic, but what I really could use is what laundry practices worked best for you. I have been soaking wet items in vinegar, then laundering as usual. Sometimes I use laundry sanitizer, but I don't like the way they smell (can't seem to find the unscented one). I have read the bed-layering advice, and I think the sheets will be easy -- always white cotton, all bleachable. But DH doesn't wear any clothing I can bleach, so I need other solutions. I would also really like to know if others experienced this at nighttime first. DH always drinks a large glass of seltzer or soda with dinner -- is that a mistake? Did anyone restrict liquids after a certain hour? I don't want to dehydrate him, either. He always urinates after dinner, but it doesn't seem to stop these episodes a few hours later. I have already broached the idea of "special underwear" -- they are waiting in the closet for a trial. And on a personal note, my heart is breaking. I knew this was coming, but having it arrive on an almost-daily basis is like a smack in the face.

ButterflyWings

tigersmom - I know how you feel and am sending you hugs. The gut-punches dementia deals us every so often really are heart breaking. Even when we know its coming sooner or later, as you say. There is just no way to be ready for the feels that accompany another step down for our LOs.

I am not the expert regarding laundry odors but will be watching for the replies as I can use them too. There were a great couple of threads a while back, but we were not there yet -- it was on the old website format so I don't think I have it bookmarked any more. But there were lots of great tips and some highly recommended products to get rid of the urine smell. Now that we have a few extra leaks (daily) I just rinse DH's wet clothes in the bathtub before sending through the heavy washer cycle, and that seems to do the trick so far.

Note, we have had to begin using an extra pad inside the tabbed incontinence briefs (diaper-style), because he was peeing profusely as well. Especially at night. I would have to get up every 4 hours at night to keep him dry and that was almost as bad as having to strip off wet clothes and sheets 2x a day. So, we found the double layer incontinence coverage is simply what he requires at this point. The pad is designed to absorb a ton of liquid, and then any overflow can still go into the main brief somehow. I don't know how it works but it does. The only downside is it gets bulky really fast, so it is obvious he's got on a "diaper". He doesn't care at this point, but I cringe a little regarding his dignity. But wet pants is not too dignified either, so we go with the padded pants look these days. Proudly (or at least unapologetically).

I too do not withhold water or juice, since I never want to risk dehydration although I also don't give him a lot of liquids late in the evening. Just enough to swallow his nighttime meds. Maybe 4-6 oz in a mug. It sounds like your DH may be taking in a lot of liquid with dinner, contributing to your situation. Is he maybe amenable to wearing the "special underwear" at night, if that is your current problem time?

It sounds like it might be time to disappear the regular briefs altogether, and just put the new underwear in his drawers (furniture lol). That's what I did and DH just put them on one day, even before the incontinence started. He was still able to dress himself at that time, though it wasn't perfect. I was SUPER excited to see the gray Depends peeking out from the hem of his shirt that first day. I'm sure I posted about the Big Win! That strategy was suggested here on these boards so I tried it and never even had to discuss it with him. Doesn't take much to please a dementia caregiver, I'm afraid :) But after the relief and elation wore off a bit, I also wanted to cry. Yeah. We just have to take a deep breath, shoulders back, stiff upper lip and keep going. Thanking heaven and my lucky stars for small favors and mini-blessings every single day. Even though this journey is nothing any of us would choose, I appreciate the help from this community.

Ed1937

I think you'll have luck with Oxi-Clean for both white and colored clothes. You might be able to find it on sale on Amazon or Costco. Just follow directions with it. I always used bleach for sheets and white clothes.

You might take a look at parenting.com for different kinds of pull ups or diapers. They have some high quality products, and they are an excellent online company, in my opinion. You can order samples for $2.99, and they come 2 to a pack. Samples take a little longer to get than if you would put in a regular order. But what works well for someone might not be best for you. I would suggest trying samples of different ones so you can get the best one for your needs.

gampiano

Hello,

I use something called Zero Odor Eliminator, buy on Amazon. It is unscented and a small amount along with your regular detergent does the job. I do use Oxyclean when i wash the bed linen.

When my husband started leaking, i used depends , but as time went on, i took some advice from these forums and ordered from Parentgiving. They will send you samples to try, and they have good choices.

Their products are great.

It took DH awhile to get used to the underwear, but now its not even an issue. I know that this is very difficult to accept, but it is manageable. One trick that i use when changing, is to cut the pants down the sides with bandage scissors. Even though they are "tearable", it is much faster and cleaner to cut. Have a plastic bag ready to grab and seal up so you don't have odor. Also, rinse free disposable washcloths are a blessing.

Hope all this helps,

Maureen

Jeff86

We have done well with incontinence products from northshorecare.com—very absorbent briefs, scented disposal bags, and wipes.

Denise1847

I don't know anything about this but I have heard about a type of wicking product for incontinence. Does anyone have experience with it? I believe it draws the urine away from the skin.

harshedbuzz

Prevention or limiting impact is key.

Sample different incontinence products to fine what works best for you. Companies like Northshore and Adult Diapers and Incontinence Products - Parentgiving offer excellent products and will send some to try at home.

IME, urine odors tend to linger most in synthetic blends like poly/cotton. And especially if they've been dryed in a dryer. I would switch over to 100% cotton where you can.

It's like cloth diapering. A cold water rinse asap followed by laundering in hot water and mild detergent. Rinse twice. Some folks do vinegar in the final rinse. Too much detergent, sofener and additives can be counter-productive and hold odors by coating the fabric. If the smell has been baked-in, it might not be fixable.

This is good stuff.

Urine Remover | Clorox®

HB

Whyzit

According to my DH urologist, carbonated drinks and caffeinated beverages as well as decaf coffee cause bladder irritation and inflammation resulting in urinary problems. She advised limiting drinking to mealtime only which is difficult to manage. In addition diabetics are at increased risk if their blood sugar is not managed well because this imbalance creates more thirst. Best wishes to you.

tigersmom

Many, many thanks to all who rang in here. I am not exaggerating when I say you all made it possible for me to sleep again. I am ordering everything you recommended (Maureen, thanks for Zero Odor Eliminator and the adult wipes, and Ed for Oxi-Clean) -- and I am so touched by your caring and supportive words. I have upped my prompting, and yesterday there were no accidents. I know that won't be the case going forward, so I truly appreciate your help. Don't know what I'd do without this site.

Caro_Lynne

My LO wears "special underwear" however he will not pee in them. He is still able to use the bathroom but I don't know what he does that whenever he urinates he comes out with wet pants (not the underwear). I guess he must let it dribble without realizing. Suffice it to say I have never done as much laundry as I do now since I have to change him just about every time he pees.

I use OxyClean powder with every wash and Persil detergent. So far it's working to remove the smell.

HB you are so right about the fabric blends holding the odor; that's been the case with his clothes.

AnderK

Hi, zero odor laundry is amazing. I hate his poly pants, and one by one, they are disappearing into the trash. I treat the crotches both inside and outside, with a solution of half vinegar, half water in a spray bottle, and the zero odor and 1 to two wash tabs. Use the deep water wash and COLD water. Sounds gross, but after the wash, I smell them before drying. If scent is not gone, I do it again.

Zero odor also has a spray all purpose that I have used on chairs and upholstery. And, frankly, if it is a small spot on the sheet, I use it there...changing the sheets several times a week has worn me down.

I have used Clorox spray cleaner on my painted bar stools .a quick spray and leave for 10 minutes, then wipe with a paper towel...test first and then be careful to not over spray. Remember that you did that...I got distracted once and sat down on the Clorox. My favorite jammies ruined, and not so great for my skin!!! Sigh.

PaulaT

I have found Odo -Ban works well . It comes in a gallon container. There are a few different scents. I put it directly on the wash and use a spray bottle and dilute with water for cleaning things like mattress or upholstery. You can purchase through Amazon, I buy it at Dollar General.

ESoprano

Newer washers are shockingly water stingy, so I always use a high (cold) water, extra agitation cycle. And liquid detergent works better poured directly on the wash (vs the dispenser). Our son is disabled so we've dealt with this issue over 25 years. Really appreciate the recommendations, there's always something new to learn & try. I love Target's water repellant mattress covers. We also use 1-2 removable cloth pads atop the fitted mattress pad. Hope this helpful.

harshedbuzz

Another thought, especially for those using a HE machine with lower water consumption--

Make sure your machine is clean. There's a tendency to use too much detergent and additives to your loads-- especially if they contain something "nasty"-- which will build up and coat the backside of the tub and hold those odors plus moldy ones as well.

If your machine doesn't smell fresh empty, clean it a few times with a product like Affresh and then maintain monthly.

HB