Feeling sad - Missing our mom while she is still with us

CaliforniaGirl-1

We are lucky. After a number of hair raising, exhausting, heartbreaking years we finally got our mother into a safe situation. (for the moment)

But now I am really missing her. I think of things I want to tell her and that she would have enjoyed talking about a few years ago and of course she can't. When she goes, I am worried that this is how I will remember her and not how she was for most of her life.

At least I am able to focus on how much I love her and not on the frustration of the previous years. But I am sad.

Have other people experienced this?

TiffanyDR

I'm new to the group and this is my first response, but yes, I know how you feel. I was just telling my husband how strange I feel mourning the loss of someone who is still here. I miss the good times with my mom too, the great conversations. Sometimes we have them and sometimes we don't. I've been taking pictures of us smiling together and writing out happy times so I can remember her that way. I'm sorry that you're going through this. I'm sorry for all of us and I'm keeping all of us in my prayers.

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Istoppedescaping

Yes all the time, I miss my Mom. I try to keep busy, taking care of yourself is very important. I cook, clean, just keep focusing on what I can control and not the past or future which is out of my control. I hope this helps.

LilFierceChris

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I’m in a similar boat. My dad is only 65 and in late stages. Due to an unhealthy situation with his wife I did not have much contact with him over the past 2 years. I am now his legal guardian and conservator and I’m so angry that I’m left to deal with this when he’s essentially gone and missed out on the last few years of the him while he was still “here”.