delusions money

mike 1

My wife ,age 73 ,is at stage 4 {I think} Over the past 3 or 4 years she has accused me of taking cash or checks from her 5 different times. Yesterday I almost caught her taking $700 from my wallet. I'm sure she has it hid somewere by now. Her memory is very bad , so there's a good chance she will not remember she took the money or where she hid it. I think I should let it slide.

What do you think? Yes I know I should not keep that much cash around.

SDianeL

I would look for and find the cash and secure it. I would lock my wallet up somewhere where she can't get to it. She could take other things that are more important than cash. Yes you should let it slide with her because she doesn't understand what she's doing and trying to reason with her won't work.

SDianeL

this document might help you understand the behaviors and stages. Someone else posted it. https://tala.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/Tam-Cummings-LLC-Handouts.pdf

Jgirl57

So sorry this is happening Mike; That was one of my HWD/Alz earlier symptoms. He would accuse me and my son of taking his money . It was so very difficult for me to understand. I had to start hiding my purse to keep him from looking for “his money”. ( or watch or anything else he misplaced). Let it slide for now and hopefully you will be able to find it. As time went on for us into stage 5, the accusations are diminishing .

M1

Mike i also had to secure my wallet, any personal items and papers, meds etc because my partner got so she didn't recognize them as mine and would go looking for them, i once came upstairs after a treadmill workout and she had my wallet, license, and credit cards strewn all over and was asking who they belonged to. Very frustrating, i was at the point of having to get deadbolt locks for bedroom doors.

You'll probably find the cash somewhere odd when you're not looking for it. After 18 months in MC I'm still finding things occasionally.

AZgrandma

Try not to confront her as it may only upset her. Can you try to look for it when she is not present or maybe redirect her to do something else while you look for it? My husband did this with $800. I finally found it tucked into a small space in his office. He is doing this now with lots of things. Removing them from their original storage places, separating them and putting them in places all over the house. I try to keep a constant eye on him now and see where he puts those things. I don't say a word, but, I do look when he is napping or taking a walk. If I find them, I take them and put them in a safe place and he usually doesn't know what has happened anyway.