Thank you everyone for you continued support and love.

ladypeewee

Thank you all for your replies and comments. This Group has helped me so much over the years.

When we are going through this journey, We come to the last time our loved ones does something and not realize it's the last time. Taking the trash out or washing dishes, doing laundry , checking the oil in the car. holding hands or kissing and being intimate with each other, all these thing hurt and make us sad when we realize that the last time was the last time.

The heart break really comes after they are gone. I went to mine and William's favorite place to eat by myself the other day, I thought it wouldn't bother me because I've eaten there before all alone before he passed, This time it hit me that I would never take him in there again. And I broke down and cried like a baby. I can't look at his side of the bed yet so I have it covered up with pillows and blankets, I had to clean out his dresser cause I can't look at his clothes, I went to church Sunday and I lost it because they sang Amazing Grace Which is one of the songs that was sung at his funeral service. I need a change so I am going to go stay with my sister for awhile. When asked how i am doing i reply with I am fine it's fine everything is fine and it's going to be ok.

ButterflyWings

(((Lady PeeWee))) Holding you in our hearts.

ImMaggieMae

It hurts so much because you loved each other so much. How do you get past the pain of losing someone? Time, I guess. Knowing that there are so many of us here at different stages of your journey who understand and wish we could take your pain away. You aren’t alone. There may be miles between us all, but I pray that you can feel our closeness in your heart. I think staying with your sister for a while is a good idea. It will get your mind in a different place for short periods of time until you can deal with all these thoughts which are so overwhelming now. The sad thoughts gradually turn into good memories that will make you smile rather than cry. There were so many happy times before these “last” times. Those memories eventually are the ones that will take over.

Ed1937

You're right. It's going to be OK. When we're dealing with dementia, it doesn't seem as though the end will be so hard. But it is so much worse, at least it was for me. I understand why your emotions got the best of you at the restaurant. About two months after my wife passed, two of our sons and one daughter took me to a major league baseball game. It was the worst day of my life. But with time it will get easier. I promise.

Mint

Lady thinking of you. Glad you have a sister there for you.

White Crane

Thanking of you and sending hugs and prayers for comfort

A. Marie

Dear Lady Peewee, I too am a wife in Stage 8, and I totally get it. My DH died June 4. I'm just getting around to letting myself feel things that I couldn't allow myself to feel while DH was alive because I might break down completely. But please do let yourself feel everything you couldn't feel before. That's the only way I'm getting through this, and it may work for you too. Hands across the miles to you and all the rest of us. I think of all of you as my sisters and brothers in suffering.

Jgirl57

Cherish this time away and with your sister .Big hugs to you for making that decision.

Jo C.

Hello Lady; I have been thinking of you. It is a good idea to spend some time with your sister; a bit more support letting you process all that has happened in a place that brings comfort is a very good idea and am glad you are doing that for yourself.

I also wanted to say that you will continue to be part of this extended electronic family as much as you wish to be. Some of us have been here for years after our Loved One has passed on.

You may find going onto the ongoing Thread of Lorita's which is titled; "Just Need To Talk To My Friends," a pleasant experience. Since her husband has passed a few years back, Lorita lives alone on a large farm with cattle all by herself. She is older and shares much about the cattle and all the babies being born, etc. Very interesting. Those of us who stay on her ongoing Thread say we are visiting on her "Front Porch," and we all have our own rocking chair there. No matter how bad the weather is off the porch; it is always perfect and pleasant on the porch. Many folks on that Thread have lost their LOs and some still have their LOs with them. Most of us have literally been on Lorita's Front Porch for years and always new folks arriving. Large variety of topics for sure.

Mostly it is as simple Thread where we talk about our days; what we are doing or not doing; how we are feeling healthwise, recipes and advice to one another about all sorts of things not connected to dementia. Like a quilting bee without the quilt. You are very welcome should you like to come on in, pull up a rocking chair and set a spell.

Sending best thoughts your way,

J.

Jo C.

ttt