Bathroom Advice

​fesk

Hello,

I care for my mom who has advanced dementia. She stands and transfers well and can walk but not reliably - meaning, when she is tired or decides to, will just sit down. So, mainly we walk in house to keep her strength and keep her active. Someone is always following behind with a wheelchair. She cannot navigate stairs, so her bedroom was moved to the first floor which does not have a shower - only a very small half bath. She is not ready for bed baths. We wash her daily with washcloths in the bathroom. She allows this with minimal fuss. She also still uses the bathroom throughout the day. We take her in the wheelchair and she will stand and transfer to the toilet.

The half bath is entirely too small and will not be manageable soon. I need to expand it so we have more room and want to include a shower. Space is very limited though. I am going to get someone to come in and come up with some ideas.

I am looking for any advice you can offer based on experience with your LOs - what challenges might be faced, what would be helpful, what wouldn't be helpful, what may not be needed now but may be needed in the future. I am afraid I will not think of something and as the disease progresses, the changed bathroom will not meet our needs. I don't want to make an expensive mistake.

Your help is greatly appreciated. Thank you.

mommyandme (m&m)

Hi fesk!

My first thought is by the time the shower is installed will your mom be tolerant of showers. What kind of mess is it going to be during the remodel to the bathroom, is this her primary bathroom? Sounds like a big undertaking. If the sponge/towel baths are working maybe simplify your life by not putting in the shower. Sounds kinda bass-ackwards doesn’t it. The shower is meant to simplify your lives. There are some good portable basins around for washing hair.

I have experience with two walk-in showers. The one at my moms home, where we moved her from, didn’t have a transition so walking straight in was a breeze and it had no shower curtain. But the bathroom was fairly large to accommodate it along with the toilet and sink. There was a shower chair used in that one when needed. The one here had about a three or four inch transition and most of the time she’d stub her toes or stumble on it getting in or out. It was hard for her to understand the command to lift her foot. That was in a very small bathroom. There was a built in seat which was very helpful. A couple of grab bars are necessary in the shower and we made the towel bar a large grab bar too which was helpful in many ways. Of course a hand held shower head is detrimental, in my opinion.

Im curious what your final decision will be. It’s nice to hear from you.

Kathryn Mc

Hi Fesk , my mom does the same thing when she is tired. Just sits wherever she is, often outside on the ground. 😊 when we remodeled in anticipation of our “now”situation, we pushed out the back of the shower to allow space to add a sitting spot. There was a hall closet behind the wall of the shower so we used half of that space. It is deep enough to allow me to step in the shower with my mom without getting completely soaked. Although she still is able to stand while I shower her, I do occasionally have her sit. The step to get into the shower is 5” high so that is manageable. Because the shower floor is built up it is only a 1.5” lip on the inside. For my MIL we made a ramp to her shower. Bathroom was bigger and she couldn’t step up. Shower floor is small 1” squares hence giving a non slip surface. We used a natural non smooth stone. Removable shower head with the magnet works best. We didn’t put in a hand rail in the shower but we should have. I believe they have one that can suction to the wall. The bathroom is small with toilet and sink and shower. So far works great. I usually enjoy the shower time with my mom as she enjoys it and it often relaxes her. Blessings

​fesk

Hi m&m! I hope you are well. I've been reading the boards and contributing sporadically as I've been swamped. I understand all your cautions and they make absolute sense. I feel I need to at least look into a remodel because the bathroom is soooooo small and will not be manageable soon. So, even if the shower portion is not often (or ever) used, we will have the room needed to comfortably handle the sponge baths, have two people assist if needed, etc. I am hoping she will tolerate it if it is done, because I think a shower would be good for her occasionally.

Kathryn Mc - thank you so much for the feedback and tips. I do think we would go with no transition. Lots to think about. I am glad it is working so well for your mom.

I'll take it one step at a time. Get some drawings and ask lots of questions!

Thank you both.