How Do You Know When They Really Cannot Be Left Alone?

ginateresa

Hi, all. I don't get on here much. Two jobs and caregiver for my Mom after I moved in with her last year.

I worry about finding out the hard way that she shouldn't be left alone any longer. She is really good at covering up for her weaknesses and I feel she is still at the stage where she does not want to worry me.

How will I know when she needs constant assistance? I really don't want to find out the hard way that she's fallen and gotten hurt.

Thanks for the input.

M1

Hi gina. Such a tough question. This isn't meant to be trite, but: there's a saying around here that if you're starting to ask the question, you're probably close to being there. There's a similar medical situation regarding whether to do a tough procedure like a spinal tap: if it crosses your mind that this person might need a spinal tap, then it just needs to be done, period. This is quite similar, ditto with whether someone should be driving or handling finances: if you're asking, you already know the answer. As you suggested, you don't want the first episode to be a crisis.

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Emily 123

Hi,

Great points here. Also consider that it's not just about doing something that puts herself at risk, but that if she ends up in a situation that needs a snap decision and critical thinking, she may no longer have the capacity to do those things, or choose the most expedient course in an emergency.

machelriller

I echo the other comments here. My dad started showing anxiety when my brother (his primary caregiver) was away for a few hours. My brother came home to find my dad in the front yard looking for him. My dad gave up driving very easily, but one day while my brother was out, he went for a drive after not driving for months. Those were warning signs to us.

ginateresa

Thank you all for your input.